the world according to sherimaven

Good morning, Monday. Quite the weekend.  I went to see Bryan Ferry Friday night amidst a sea of baby boomers and then off to the Hamptons on Saturday to see the opening of the Helen Frankenthaler show, more on that later in the week.  But as the weekend was winding down and I was perusing the interweb, I happened upon J.Crew. And let me say- it's been a minute or two since I've paused to look at anything they've been doing since Jena Lyons left. I know she was polarizing but I was and still am a big fan of her quirky style. But I digress.

Actually, if I'm being honest, I happened upon a J.Crew print dress that popped up in my feed last week and it gave me pause for its cuteness. And my further investigation led me down a J.Crew rabbit hole last night and dare I say- J.Crew may very well be back. Under the new design chops of Chris Benz (he's designing women and kids), he of Bill Blass fame, we may just have a hit on our hands.

So much to love under his tutelage. Here are ten pieces to buy right now, and that I'd wear here, there, and everywhere. Oh, and good news- seems like the sizing is fairly inclusive. These are things that I really love but plenty more to choose from on the site.

This pull-on slip skirt is divine. I love the petal pink and would wear this all the time with a pretty sweater like it's shown here. What a great transitional piece for Fall when you still want to show a bit of tan gam.

This little sweater/blazer is divine. And in my favorite print. Love how it's styled with double denim vibes.

These resin earrings give me major Rachel Comey vibes. Love 'em.

This blouse has such a great vibe. I honestly can't decide what color I want the most. I want them all truly. But that green.

And this long sweater blazer thing is gorgeous. I love how this is styled. So minimal chic for those concerned that J.Crew can feel too fussed up. Lovely.

This high necked tunic dress is totally Isabel Marant like but much more reasonable. Love it in black or bottle green.

This shirtwaist dress is very elegant and pretty/crisp as we wind down the Summer. 

 And the shoes. Holy merde. So many goodies.  I love these mules in white. 

And these fancy slingbacks are super duper chic. I would love them with rolled-up jeans, a blazer, and a tank or a dress with a full skirt.

And wouldn't you know I've been searching for the perfect, no-frills, nondescript tote to schlep from gig to gig with? I love this one from Rains. it's so good and easy and minimal. Perfect for the city.

I have said time and time again that although retail seems to be on the wane, good clothes are not. I believe strongly in the power of good clothes to transform a brand- and exciting stuff appears to be happening over at the Crew shop. Lovely. And bonus points for much of it being on sale.

Oh and that cheeky lippy sweater at the top of the post? Link to buy here. A shrunken cashmere cutie for $138 is kind of awesome.

Cause that's what's up this American classic of a Monday in the 212. Yours, in elevated basics and style standouts. XO

Good morning, Friday. It's such a pretty day today and I don't have to be anywhere until 1 pm and I'm just so happy to be home with the dog as the sun shines bright in the sky and the weekend begins.

So I'm part of a group of a Facebook group for women of a certain age that veers towards snark and funny witticisms most of the time and is very rarely a place to share fashion tips. But yesterday one of the women in the group posted that she would never, under any circumstances, wear leopard print. Which made me think- how different we all can be when it comes to what we wear.  Because for me, leopard is a neutral. I own scads of it and have always felt great wearing it- I mean- how chic is Kate moss above? Iconic. And then I started thinking about my "no way Joses" when it comes to what I wear. Here's a list of five things that, though right for others, are so not right for me.

A polo or rugby shirt. Strong no to this look for me. It's a cute, preppy, tomboy look for some women. When I wear anything with that type of polo collar, I look like Mrs. Tumbletee, my less than feminine high school gym teacher. It just doesn't' work for me. At all.

Shorts. I have good legs. Or at least they are a part of me that I can easily get in shape when I need to. But I ended my relationship with shorts some time ago and never really looked back. I do love them on others (how cute is the pic above?) - particularly the paper bag variety I've seen around town this summer. But on me? Nah. Give me a minidress over shorts any day. I have no problem wearing something short, just not shorts. Capiche?

Wedges. Ok, this is one I don't really love on anyone if I'm being real. I will never, ever forget the middle of the night car ride back from a shoot in Long Beach when my creative director at the time went off on why women should not wear wedges, and I have to say- he was right. I find them really unattractive. Plus walking on them is so precarious. The only wedge I don't fully mind is a small one on an espadrille. Other than that, I'm a strong no on them. Unflattering. Thank you. Next.

Dark toes. I get my toes done all year round. Possibly because I lived in Miami for so long where toes were always exposed. And though many New York girls go dark when it comes to cold weather pedicures, I simply can't. It looks horrible on me, except on my fingernails. I either need pinkish toes or bright toes. That's it. Oh and never red toes. That's just not me.

Lilly Pulitzer. This one is fairly obvious if you know me but me in Lilly? Just plain silly. Can you even picture it? I would potentially wear something vintage and do love the story of how she started her brand, but truly, no. I am not built for Lilly and Lilly ain't built for me and that's that.  A bit too Kappa Kappa Whatever for me. I do love a print, ps. Just not necessarily a preppy one. In fact, LP is the antithesis of who I am, style-wise, and that's the truth. Keep your cotillion chic. It's not for me.

Curious to hear what your big no's are when it comes to how you dress. It's fascinating to get older for many reasons, but one of the biggest lightbulbs is knowing what looks good on you and owning it. So yea, leopard. I will always love her. And that's that. But Lilly? Nope. I guess the big takeaway here is I am not a preppy girl. I have always liked a preppy look on men, but it does not work on me. No way. PS- classic and preppy are different. I wear pearls all the time and love classic pieces like a navy blazer, great jeans, and perfect ballet flats.

Oh and one more- long hair. That ain't me. I can't do it.

Cause that's what's up this well dressed Friday in the 718.  Know thyself. Yours, in what not to wear. XO

Good afternoon, Thursday.

As most of you know, my focus on this blog has shifted to something more of the moment or at least the current moment I'm in. 

I believe strongly that ageism has become a front and center conversation because of some awesome trailblazers who refuse to be defined by their age. Ad folks all know Cindy Gallop and how much of a pioneer and reinventrix she is. And my friend Irma Zandl is a national treasure when it comes to still knowing what's cool, and teaching us how to be fiscally responsible so we too can go into 50+ land in any way we want. And then, of course, I stumbled upon the cover of In Style for September, where the very beautiful Amber Valletta is rocking that iconic Versace safety pin dress like the badass boss she is. I can't handle it. In a good way.

So it was with great pleasure I got to work on a launch with my friends at StriVectin, the skincare brand I regularly work with,  to address ageism head-on, with an absolute icon. Ladies and gentleman (for the one man reading this ;), I give you Lauren Hutton, who they boldly chose as the new global ambassador of their brand.

And here's the thing. What I love about Lauren besides her insanely iconic American effortlessness and her gorgeous gap-toothed grin is her moxie. She can rap like Ferlinghetti on a hot tin roof or speak with great candor about the ground she broke when she became the first model to secure a million-dollar contract with Revlon. And what's even more fabulous is- ya. She's got a real face. A beautiful real face but a real face nonetheless. It's got lines and roadmaps to a life well-lived.  I love that she looks how she has always looked, and even better. For me, I support style expressions of all kinds, but Lauren knows what suits her. She always has. And she hasn't turned to caftans or prints or wacky glasses. She shows up in a white tee-shirt and a navy blazer and some killer shoes with that amazing vibe and it's game over, kids. She's magical. Truly. I also love that her hair, a signature,  is medium length and beautifully sun-kissed in terms of its hue. She's not going gray and that's a-ok. Because that's the point- as a woman who's aging, you have choices. You can color your hair or let it all go. You can get the botox or skip it in favor of some great products. You can look at your accomplishments and realize you're not nearly done yet. Also, she's wrestled an alligator and came face to face with a snake that looked like Joan Didion. I mean...thank goodness for women like Lauren. 

And I think Lauren had the right idea all along. She worked to fund endless adventures to far-flung climes. She's unapologetically sexy and is not afraid of it. It was so cool to work on this project and I love how the compass is calibrating to a more thoughtful and authentic conversation around age. And inspirational to boot.

So Lauren, Lauren, Lauren. All day. Since it's Thursday, here's some throwbacks. But I particularly love how she looks now. She continues to show what it means to be a true, natural woman. More power to her and more power to us all for owning who we are. Oh and bonus points for loving hats. They are a girl's best friend. Know that.

And that's what's up this change is in the air kind of Thursday in the 212. Never be afraid to be exactly who you are. What could be more beautiful than that?  XO

Good morning, Tuesday. I have a big launch party to attend tonight- more on that tomorrow. Excited to share what I've been working on the past few months. It all culminates tonight.

Thanks for indulging my feels yesterday. I was overwhelmed and nd desperately needed an escape from this soupy city. Now that I got to phone a friend after work, get a good night's sleep and hit a spin class this morning, I feel better. Back to basics, some may say.

And speaking of basics, I need to share with you my favorite new clothing line of late. I just love, love, love it.  Their website boasts "uniforms for individuals", a sentiment I appreciate and I think a whole lot of others will too.

Alex Mill is the brainchild of two former J.Crew and Madewell mishpocha, and one of the founders is the son of Mickey Drexler so they know a thing or twelve about elevated basics.  These are the clothes the Gap should be making. For real. I love everything about everything here. There's fabulous utilitarian chic jumpsuits, peppy striped shirtdresses for late Summer jaunts, and of course- super basics like soft tee shirts and oversized boyfriend shirts. 

This Swiss dot tuxedo shirt is high on my list for Fall, as is that awesome white shirtdress- love how they've styled it over jeans.  One giant miss for this new standout is the lack of size inclusion. I feel like these clothes would look fabulous on women of all shapes and sizes so why not guys? I just read that over 67% of women in America wear over a size 14 in clothing. So why not bring all of this coolness to everyone? 

Also, the men's stuff is not quite there for me- not quite "cool" enough but am curious to know how the khakis fit and if the tee shirts are soft. David may have to go for a test run. They have a new store in Soho at 63 Greene Street between Spring and Broome. As for price, I don't see much for over 200 bucks, but it's pricier than the Gap, so hoping the quality reflects the cost.

I also love how they do a capsule called "Alex Mill Editions" which are limited run pieces in reclaimed materials. Smart. I love this custom dyed sweatshirt. They are having a dye class on Thursday at their space but are currently sold out. Looking forward to seeing what they have at the space next.

What do you think of this new line and is it just me that wants it all? These are clothes meant to be worn over and over. Are you watching, Gap? Make these types of things and bring people back to your brand. I've been saying fix the damn clothes for years and stop throwing money at advertising. I think Alex Mill is getting it right on most fronts- great design, sustainable materials, in-store experiences. Now they just need to extend their sizing. I absolutely think this brand is poised for success.

Cause that's what's up this American classic of a Tuesday in the 212. Yours, in simple silhouettes. XO

Good almost afternoon, Monday. It's hard to write or think after this weekend. It's time for this country to stop saying "this isn't who we are". Because it very much is who we are. And we need prolific, Nobel Prize-worthy sea change.  It's hard to take. Extraordinary times. 

And to top it off, New York in August. Ugh. At the beginning of the Summer, I'm like "hooray Summerinthecity". By the end, I'm like "omg Summerinthemotherfuckingcity". 

Every time I am stuck in this town in August, I feel a sense of depletion and perhaps a smattering of defeat. Although it's beyond lovely to have what seems like the entire city to yourself most weekends, it's hot. And a little smelly. And there's a seasonal fatigue hanging in the air as we wait for the air to crisp and the leaves to turn and it feels a bit flatlined in terms of the typical sense of possibility one feels when living here.  I just found myself fantasizing about the French countryside and road trips and copious wine and earthy food.  And then I switched to laying in cool water somewhere, destination unknown. And then back to France. 

There should be a rule that we all need to retreat in August. Like the Europeans do. Otherwise, when left to my own devices, I'll just sit here and bum myself out (make myself feel better?) listening to Nico's "These Days" while I work. I go out walking...

But the good news about New York in August is surely September. Because it's just around the corner. And that whole rentrée vibe takes over in the city and it's almost time for sweaters and you order a hot coffee instead of an iced and then suddenly you're missing Summer in a wistful way that's poetic but you can't wait for Fall. Sigh. I love the seasons, don't you?

I just wanted to share my feels this (almost) afternoon. I'm glad I spent a week at the beach and all but it's August in New York and I can honestly say I'd like to be somewhere "other". I'm tired of all the awful news. I'm tired of the heat messing up my makeup. I'm just plain tired. Don't look at me.

Cause that's what's up this sleepy, sultry Summer day in the 212. Yours, in seasonal disorders and such. Where to next?  XO

Good morning, Friday. Let me start by saying that this week kicked my ass. Completely. I have no ass left. None. 

So as I continue to explore the evolution of my career, there are moments. Moments where you feel like you can't get anything right. Moments where people's obsession and agony over every freaking word makes you feel insane. Moments where you wish you were independently wealthy, interspersed with remembering how grateful you are for having work in the first place. All of those moments.

But as I continue to grow my creative career path, there are some inevitable bumps in the road. One of those bumps that has me reaching for a seat belt is vulnerability. I have never experienced such a deep sense of it in my work as I do now. What I mean by this is that although writing on behalf of brands is not "personal", it still feels very close to my heart and soul. My writing does. And when people rip it apart and agonize over my words it's tough sometimes. Very tough. I have learned through this process to never get too attached or fall in love with my ideas. It's not that I don't stand up for things when they are great, but I have learned what's worth fighting for and to only fight for the right things. But even when I wave the white flag, that doesn't mean I don't get a little beat up from the battle sometimes. At times, it's all just too obtuse. And exhausting.

Thing is, everyone's a writer. We write emails, posts, memos to staff. So everyone has an inevitable bias when it comes to words. It's entirely subjective and you could go around and around a million times over one sentence, mission statement, or headline.  It can rip your heart out.  And though everyone's a writer, being creative is a whole different thing. Completely.  PS this rule applies to most creative things now- take photographers for instance.  We are all endlessly snapping iPhone pics and thinking we're Avedon. There's some great stuff out there, but it complicates things for people who do this for a living. 

I just wanted to share how challenging it is to be creative for hire. And to get paid for it. Every job is hard and though this one is more fun than most, it can feel gnarly.  It's humbling to do work that is close to your heart and spirit. I'm not saying copywriting for brands is a heart thing for me, but my writing sure is.

That's why I need to dedicate much of my free time to writing my own stuff. As I do here. I appreciate the finesse of writing professionally, but I don't want to lose what made me love writing in the first place. And that's my voice. My POV. My words. Me me me basically. ;) My gratitude knows no bounds for having been able to shift gears and follow my passion, but you can't forget about why you did it in the first place. I'm tough enough to take the heat. But on occasion, I need to get out of the kitchen.

Hey So on occasion, I have to take a pause and remind myself not to get too down when it all goes to shit. Because it often does. But then it all somehow works out and you hit a home run and it's all ok again. I'm tapped into my most creative side right now and I'm willing to take the good with the bad because it's totally and completely worth it. And I realize it's all very much part of the process. I wouldn't trade it for the world. Well, maybe for my own novel or screenplay. 

Cause that's what's up this putting it all out there kind of Friday in the 212. Yours, in what are words worth? XO

Good morning, Tuesday. I know I'm late to the party with this lipstick post (yesterday was a national lipstick holiday), but no matter. I wanted to write about some boy stuff yesterday. So here's one for my girls. That pic is by Marilyn Minter above, and don't you just? So stunning.

But great photography aside, lIpstick is like another world to me. I have a love/hate relationship with it. At times I think it looks vulgar- not on anyone else, mind you- just me. At other times I feel like it's too "makeup" and not really my style, even though I'm prone to dramatic eyes for daytime. Something about lipstick can just feel so artificial, and for me, the challenge is finding one that is like my lip color, but a little bit better. I tend to stick to rosy hues- I've talked a million times about my love for Dolce Vita from Nars- it's still one of the best neutrals out there. Soft and pretty and barely there. I also love the neutrals from Charlotte Tillbury- for a redhead (and right now I am Run Lola red and loving it)  she really gets the lip color thing- I'm digging on Stoned Rose big time right now.  The name alone...

But I digress. Because I like a bargain as much as the next girl and cheap lipstick is often just that. But I've found two formulas of the same genre that I like, and both are under 20 bucks. Read on.

Let me start by saying that the word "matte" terrifies me.  I have always been someone that preferred a dewy visage to a matte one. And when it comes to lipstick, I've always gone more gloss or sheer than not. Matte lipstick says high pigment to me, which is something I'm not that interested in. But on Prime Day (again late to the party) last week or so, I saw AOC's red lipstick was on sale so I went to check it out, hoping for a color that would keep me from looking like I'm in drag.

I did find a nice, nude neutral and man is this a MATTE look. But damn if this lipstick doesn't stay on a long time. I like this idea- because another thing I hate about lipstick is reapplying it. And at 16 bucks, it turns out it was a good investment, even though its back to its regular price of 22 dollars now. But the winner in the long-wearing lipstick game is none other than Sephora's own brand. I am crazy about this lipstick, and it's only 14 dollars.  I put this lipstick on in the am, and I swear it's still there when I get home at night, and even after I smother my dog with kisses. 

My favorite colors are Marvelous Mauve and my favorite, favorite Rose Redux. If you love a dusty rose vibe, omg. So gorgeous for real. 

Oh and in case you too have mattephobia, I'll tell you my secret. Make sure your lips are far from dry. And the best way to do that is to go for the Laneige lip mask at night. Dry lips will never happen when you use this product, even in the dead of winter. Y'all know this is an iconic maven pick. I've been using it regularly for a few years now.

So that's my little lipstick homage for the moment. And until next year most likely. 

Cause that's what's up this lip service of a Tuesday in the 212. Yours, in kisses and kisses. XO

Good morning, Monday. I had a week off at the beach which was not without challenges. I will never make myself so available again when I'm off the grid. The downside of modern life reared its ugly head this week when work came knocking and I couldn't fully power down. Merde. My own fault most likely, but still. It's hard.  I ended up with a decent tan but not as much relaxation as I would have liked. Oh well. There's always next Summer.  (Yea yea don't cry for me, Argentina...I get it).

So this weekend back in the city I went to see the new Tarantino, "Once Upon a Time in Hollywood". And let me tell you- I missed Tarantino. So very much. The movie was everything I had hoped for and more. Hollywood in the late 60s? Fantastic.  Wardrobe by Ariane Phillips? Yes, more, please. The gorgeous, sexy curves of Los Angeles by car with the radio blaring? Um, yea. Indeed. Yup.

But most of all my friends, Brad Pitt. And Leo. Always Leo. But Brad.

Truth be told, I've found my feelings for Brad Pitt troublesome throughout the years. Is he a good actor? Do I like him? Do I like his blonde, pretty boy thing? I mean, I loved him in "Fight Club".  And "Thelma and Louise" was a wonderful intro to his gorgeousness. But there were many films where I found him annoying, irritating. His use of food as props. His lack of perceived depth. And yea, I know every straight guy on Earth is ok with saying Brad Pitt is hot. Because he is. And if Brad is hot, this movie was equatorial in scale when it comes to his Pittness. I loved him so much.

The Redford vibe. The moccasins. The great tee shirts. The weathered texture of his face and his movements. This was an amazing testament to why he's amazing. And I'm not even mentioning Leo because hot damn if Leonardo DiCaprio is not always a gift. I adore him and as a washed-up western film star, he was stellar. His talents are tremendous, and he too has grown into his face; less pretty boy now and more expressive.  Watching them both onscreen was pure joy. 

We talk so much about women aging that we take for granted men age too. Now before you throw your bra at me, let me say- I get it. Men don't get dinged for aging, they become more "distinguished". I know all of this. But seeing actors from my generation coming fully into their own is inspiring- male or female. And with Keanu's newfound success, there's room for a few more at the table. And it's wonderful. For all of us.

If you're looking for a bit of your own inspiration, go see this film. It's terrifically Tarantino and fun as Summer movies can and should be. Is Tarantino the feminist hero that everyone seems to be looking for nowadays? Nope. He isn't. Margot Robbie's Sharon Tate is not wholly dimensional shall we say. But his undying love for Hollywood is beautiful to watch. And fun. More, please.

So today let's hear it for the boys. It's rare we say that nowadays. But I'm gonna say it today.

Cause that's what's up this all dudes love Brad Pitt kind of Monday in the 212. Yours, in much-needed bro time. PS I need that tee-shirt Brad's sporting above. XO

Good morning, Wednesday. No way around it- today's my birthday. And I'm feeling the feels.

Supposedly some craziness in Capricorn is making me emotional and I'll admit- I'm a bit of a puddle today. Not sad, necessarily. Just emotional.  I hate the cliche of being introspective on one's birthday, but it's unavoidable. One thing that keeps coming up for me is the notion of nurture. Or what it means to feel nurtured.

For me, nurturing myself always meant buying myself lovely clothes, shoes, skincare. It could also mean drinking too much or eating too much or indulging just too much I have always been a bit of a hedonist/pleasure-seeker so that's a slippery slope for me. Because true nourishment/nurturing of body and soul comes from taking care of yourself. And when you start eating right, for instance, it may feel like deprivation but it's really what you need to feel your best and be your best. And the constant bombardment of Instagram and Amazon Prime Day and an endless loop of emails promoting a hyper manic sales cycle, you can't help but feel manipulated by all of the messaging.  Like, maybe I really do need those Gucci shoes. Because they're discounted.  And yea, you should buy the shoes sometimes. But not all the time. For me to feel nurtured, it's not about having less a la Marie Kondo, it's just about spending less and having more time, money, and security. That's real nourishment. This is the shit you realize as you get older. Wild, right? Maybe I really don't need to be the girl with the most cake...

They say your cells and wiring change every 7 years. I'm at the end of a pivotal 7-year cycle and I can absolutely feel the changes coming. It's almost a non-negotiable now to live a more authentic life. And some lifestyle changes come with that. As do staff changes. I can no longer tolerate people that deplete me. There are levels of course. But I have to honor the fact that I'm an empathic, highly sensitive woman. And when those frequencies battle my own, see ya. I can't. And I won't. 

I've been dedicated to writing my own stuff more and more and that will be a huge focus for me for the next several years and beyond. I've broken ground on a whole new website/blog and I'll be sharing that with all of you come September. I'm feeling great about all of this and am strong in my intentions.

When I'm on a mission, I'm on a mission. And my friends, I am on a major mission.  Change is always scary for me but when I'm ready, I'm ready. I've ripped off a ton of band-aids this year. And now it's time to heal. Very grateful for this chance, and this time of life. I've never felt more connected to my deepest, happiest self. HIppie shit or no hippie shit it's true. I like to think that this year, blowing out the candles means more than wishing for something new- it means blowing out the old stuff I don't need to clear the way for moving forward.

Oh and here are a few things about my style that I'm seeing as the clock nears 50. (Not there yet. Yikes. Almost). Let's call this section "not intos" as in "no longer into it".  I think there are so many rules we subscribe to women of a certain age, and I'm having none of them. You'll see what I mean:

I'm not into high heels. I haven't been in a long time but those days are long gone. Long. I need to feel like I can move, run, and above all, be comfortable. That's that.

I'm not into anything overly dainty. It's funny- I've always loved very dainty jewelry and although I still wear my tiny star of David every day, I'm into bigger pieces of jewelry. Not more expensive, that's not what I'm staying. Just larger in scale, substantial if you will. That's where I'm at. Dainty feels too much like a little girl right now. And I'm far from that place.

I'm not into shapeless clothes. There was a time over the past several years that I wore clothes that felt potato-sack like. I'm talking to you, COS and stores of that ilk. I know when women get older, they tend to gravitate towards this look, and it is extremely chic. But because of my rebellious nature, I'm going the other way. I'm wearing shorter things. I'm wearing more body-skimming things. I'm into looks that feel a little sexier somehow and show the shape, and more importantly, honor the body I'm in.  That's what I'm in the mood for, and it has little to do with being skinny, fat, or anything else. I'm just in the mood for less Eastern bloc attire.  This is counter to what most people tell you about getting older but screw 'em. I still love some kaftan realness, though. Don't worry. I'm not crazy.

I'm not into shrinking violets. I know this may be hard for you to believe. But truth be told, I'm shy. Very. Lately, I've been feeling the need to not shy away from how I am feeling. To advocate for what I think is right and fair. Oh, and to dye my hair bright red. That too. Loud and proud I guess. That's where I am. Because of that, I do retreat from time to time. But I'm a Cancer. That's just what we do.

I'm not into rules. I love clothes. I always will. But I hate formality. And it's getting worse as I get older. I hate a fussy hairdo. I hate anything that is too "just right". I like things a little messy. Much like life. And when it comes to formal occasions, I'm going default style. A tuxedo jacket and pants. A simple dress. That's it. Keeping it simple when it comes to formal times. And then going big whenever the heck I feel like it. Like a Simone Rocha tulle dress with my Gazelles. That kind of thing. I'm into that. 

So that's my birthday post for you. Onward and such. Busy day today. Looking forward to celebrating with pals tonight at a favorite old haunt. Thanks for all the bday wishes. Love to you all and thanks for being in my life. Cause that's what's up this blowing out the candles kind of Wednesday in the 212. Yours, in onward marching, with a bit of Alice in Wonderland because I remain "curiouser" and "curiouser" for what's to come. XO

Good morning, Thursday. I'm in an office in a caftan and I'm a-ok with that.

Which got me to thinking- the way we dress. For work. Such a thing. A recent Facebook debate on a friend's page inspired me to write this post about how we focus so much on the way women look. We're fixated on it. You know why? Because the way women look is super intriguing. And why should we take that away?

Now listen up. Lest you think I'm being anti-feminist, I am not in any way. I am not saying the way women look should be some sort of harsh judgment or should overpower a conversation on competence, intelligence, or general awesomeness. Not at all. But as someone who loves clothes and has pathologically studied style my entire life, I'm not favoring drab clothing just to be taken seriously. F that.  And if I want to make a statement, I'll make a statement. And I'm self-aware enough to take risks from time to time. That's just my vibe. Like the office caftan for instance. I'm owning it.  Yea I am a creative professional which allows me greater freedom and for that, I am extraordinarily grateful.

But I digress.  Let's talk about women in politics. AOC's red lip for one. Or the white caped look she wore to the State of the Union. That was intentional. Very intentional. And that red lip is not a shrinking violet move. To me, it says take me seriously, lipstick and all. She owns her ideals and her look and that's fantastic.  Why do we have .to deny our femininity to be taken seriously? Elizabeth Warren's no-nonsense style suits her just perfectly. Because she's a no-nonsense kind of woman and that's that.  And Kamala's style suits her too- strong, confident, don't fuck with me, fellas. More of that.

Further, the women's soccer team. I happened to watch the awards ceremony on TV (where our mayor cheaply inserted himself into the conversation around pay as he also reminded us of his Presidential run- #cheapshot) where that amazing group of ladies celebrated in ripped up jeans and tee shirts. Later on, the ESPYs were broadcast, and these girls were glam to death. Megan Rapinoe, my new girl crush (me and everyone else) was wearing the lowest blazer with nothing underneath and looked sexy as hell. And I loved it. All the girls came out to the yard and showed that they can be confident, strong, and stylish. Some more traditionally feminine, some less so, but all 100% woman. I can't even handle how inspiring those women are. Get off your ass, pro soccer and pay them NOW.

People always say why don't they talk about the way the men look when it comes to politics? Well, I say give us something to talk about. I think the whole point of politics on the male side is to look kind of middle of the road- not too flashy or "too" anything really. Beto's casualness is a nod to Obama's cool swagger, but really not so interesting. People say Obama had style, to me he had swag. The most stylish male president of all time was absolutely JFK. Hands down. If men in politics are judged more for their character, it's because they don't put fashion first.  I don't want to stereotype and say women do all of the time, but what's wrong with those of us that really like clothes and expressing ourselves through how we look? Not a damn thing.

I know this is a time for women to be unhinged and unnerved and pissed off. I'm mad too. Beyond mad. But I also think it's ok for women to acknowledge that style and dress and the way we look is important. If we want it to be. And that doesn't take anything away from the other stuff. Because today's women are the full package. Whether in Louboutins or Nikes or anything in between. 

Let's not squash that. And if people want to talk about how we look, let them. We'll be busy kicking ass and taking names. See ya on the other side. Now, where's my lipstick?

Cause that's what's up this turned out kind of Thursday in the 212. Yours, in best dressed and saluting women of all shapes, sizes, and styles. XO