the world according to sherimaven

You may be surprised by this, but I'm not much of a country girl.

Good am, Friday. I can't believe this stretch of heat. You all know I have a permanent case of the vapors but seriously- this is just insane. I know I didn't sign up for this, and nor did you. Apparently it's going to break on Sunday, but I'm beginning to feel like a shut in. Impossible to enjoy anything outside in this preview of what hell must be like.

And since you can't really run around to stores, trying on things in hot dressing rooms, you'll have to take my word for it that the one dress you should buy right now is from an unexpected place- Ann Taylor. I've been a fan of their shoes and bags for a minute now- way chicer than you think but have steered clear of anything else because there's no part of me that looks good in a sheath dress- business lady chic just does not flatter me in any way. But this dress- THIS DRESS. Trust me. It looks amazing on and can serve many purposes. Super basic but perfect for those days when you're too hot to search through your closet for something to wear. 

I really love it- it's feminine, modern, and easy to wear. I'm loving this silhouette- seen on cool girls all over this hot town- the mid length button front dress has been a huge hit here.  And though I won't be wearing it with wedges (my condemnation of the shoe led to me wiping out in them, hard. Shoe justice...), this dress would look sensational with them, or with little flat nothings in the genre of K Jacques or Ancient Greek. Pair with a cute boho straw bag and you're all set, or even do one of those cute little fanny packs out now in a neutral or animal print- honestly this dress can do no wrong (which is more than I can say for most people and things), and even though it's a button down it's not binding or too tight in the chest- if you're a blessed girl upfront you're going to love this too. I know it doesn't look like much, but really what more do you need in this heat? I love a good basic and this fits the bill perfectly, yes, it's another black dress but it also comes in a dark olive green- both super workable with everything else you have accessories wise.

I think that's all I've got for now. I'm off for a vacation with hubster and Khan come Sunday. Needless to say, this dress will be right there with me, and I can't wait. Cause that's what's up this go ahead and buy both colors kind of Friday in Dante's inferno. All the love. XO

Good morning, Thursday. Thanks to all of you who wished me a happy birthday- it means the absolute world. I ran home last night to get a quick snip snip (haircut) and was having too much fun just being home that D decided to just make me a lovely and yummy dinner- we opened a bottle of bubs (which almost knocked David's eye out...crazy) and pet our little pal Khan and I was happy as could be. In true Cancerian form, I'm a big believer in there's no place like home, and in a heatwave in particular. Where did we need to go, really? So a lovely, low key birthday, just what I wished for. Thanks again for the shout outs.

Post birthday I'm back to it and recall seeing an articles in the WSJ a few weeks back on gingham, a fabric I've not been super fond of in the past, but I'm in love with it now. Obviously wearing gingham holds a cautionary tale- if you're not careful you're going to literally look like a tablecloth, but as you can see from all the fun inspiration below, rocking it is cuter than ever and not the least bit Italian restaurant. 

I'm also mad for it in the home- love the CB2 day glo number below, and the dog beds are beyond the cutest as well- I'm envisioning gingham floor pillows mixed with some ethnic touches to give a preppy/boho combo that would pack a very cool punch. And as for the boys, I love the way a gingham shirt looks in the summer time- super fresh and clean and somehow super modern while still being classic. If you are the type of dude who can pull off a gingham shirt with white jeans and some desert boots, hats off. That's a great look and you should be applauded. Adorable.

And how about that little bikini from Wildfox? So cute. Throw a blazer over that bandeau and a skinny skirt or shorts and you've got a really great look- good abs are a necessity of course. I'd prob rock it the way the chick at the top of the post does- a little casual, with a trench to keep it all easygoing and unstructured and non fussed. I also adore the way Garance Dore wears it below- so chic.

And boys try a pocket square if the whole thing is overwhelming. It's a great like with a denim shirt and blazer type sitch. I must take my leave now...I have my mind set on that little dog bed from Plum and Ivory in the UK...fabulous. Cause that's what's up this gingham style kind of Thursday in the 212. Happy dance. XO.

Good morning, Wednesday. So today is the big birthday and I woke up feeling not totally in the partying mood. It's true as we get older birthdays are not the can't wait to get out of bed moment they were when you were a kid, but I'm aware I have much to celebrate today- a great life with fulfilling work, plenty of love, and friends that make me laugh and share my point of view on any number of issues. Not to mention that sweet little fur face called Khan, who you all know makes everything ok always.

But I'm jumpy. I'm jumpy because as we grow older, we stop taking risks. When we're in our twenties ,we take risks that are, well, just too risky. We may party too much, go home with people we shouldn't, and risk our careers by maybe not understanding how we can do better and be better. We take these risks because we don't have the confidence or the wisdom to do otherwise, but then POW. One day you wake up kind of old and you realize you've got it all going on, save for some extra pounds and the need for eye cream, but guess what? You're a complete bore. Ok, maybe you're not. But I am.

I'm not at all talking about some midlife crisis that has me wanting to jump out of a plane or go find G-d somewhere. It's taking risks to break up the monotony of living a very secure life. It's informed risk sometimes, other times, it may be a risk worth taking because we are unhappy in the every day of our lives, or that thing in your life that feels so secure and safe is keeping you from real growth. I'm just saying, and take it from an old lady- just because you're older and wiser doesn't mean you can stop doing things that feel scary, unknown, or counter to the norm. I woke up this morning realizing I've lost some of my wacky streak (some of you would disagree) and I've conformed to a degree I may not be that cool with. Yea, it's textbook midlife shit. I get it. I'm not about to give it all up and live on a commune, but all I'm saying is don't be afraid to take some risks, to shake it up, and do something new. It's never too late.

So this year, I'm going to try and take a risk or two. It feels right to me in the grand scheme. I'm not sure what part of my life is going to benefit from such adventures, I think it's more a general sense of being. All the best people I know are risk takers- and I so admire people that live fearless lives. One of my fav bands of recent years, Tame Impala, has the ultimate line from their song "Feels Like We Only Go Backwards" about that sense of hoping to move forward, but always feeling a bit left back, despite conventional wisdom:

"It feels like I only go backwards baby.

Every part of me says go ahead."

You know that feeling right? Yea, sure I'm good the way I am, but that doesn't mean I can give myself the license to be inert. No way. No how. Sure I'm moving forward, but it's bigger than just leaving Miami, having a new job, and trying new restaurants every week  or changing the color of my hair. It's bigger than that- every part of me says go ahead. Every fiber. And somehow I'm realizing you don't have to give up everything you already have to do that- you can count your blessings while creating many new ones.We'll see where that takes me this year. I hope it's somewhere nice, and hopefully not too bloody hot. Cause that's what's up this bday edition of this here thing. All the love and thanks for reading. Now, get on with it. Life is short. XO

Hiya Tuesday, it's late I know but the heat has made my brain dysfunctional so apologies for the late breaking post. Tomorrow is my birthday and though there's not much I want in terms of material stuff, I do acknowledge that with age comes a greater appreciation for the classics. No, I don't mean Bach or Beethoven. What I do mean, and what I usually mean, is my fashion aesthetic. Yes, I will always wear clothes that skew more rock and roll than not, but I'm becoming more and more a fan of pieces that feel "timeless" and effortless and can be worn for years to come. Disposable fashion not really my jammy jam anymore, unless a trend strikes me that requires a quick trip to H&M, but I'm always pairing those pieces with something more basic and classic.

But classic can be boring or stodgy and we all know this- so the best way to rock the classics is to do so with a twist, which is why I am heavily hearting on Nektar De Stagni's amazing jewelry. I am a huge fan of pearls, which I like to layer with other necklaces, but how amazing is this ombre dipped necklace or even better, this shark tooth enhanced stunner? Can you picture Barbara Bush wearing either of those? No? Good.

Also what's not to love about these XO earrings? Pearls are every preppy girl's rite of passage, but doing them this way brings in a bit of wit to an otherwise boring accessory. Yes please. I mean, I'm old, but I'm not about to turn into a Stepford Wife anytime soon, though sometimes the thought of that is indeed appealing. A girl needs to keep things interesting.

So what I'm saying is even though I'm getting old as them there hills, I still got it. For a little while longer anyway. I just need a little help from some fabulous accessories and the right pieces to wear on the regs. I'm obsessed. And though my pre-birthday wish skews more on the side of wishing for justice, humanity, and sanity, I'm not mad at an edgy pearl thing or two. Cause that's what's up this punkish pearl of a Tuesday in the 212. Link below. Enjoy. XO

http://www.nektardestagni.com/

Good afternoon, Monday. I feel like I haven't been blogging much lately, and although I almost always find time to talk about something, this past week or so has felt too big in my own bones to write about lip gloss, shoes, or my favorite dress (not that I'm mad at any of those things).

I've been thinking loads lately about the notion of giving, of helping, of making a difference somewhere, somehow. In fact, it's all I think about. Between all of the natural disasters, mass shootings, regime changes, and of course, the news of the weekend having us all palpitating (we're sorry, Trayvon), it's hard to know who to help first. 

And to further complicate things, I was not raised to be an altruist. Though I love my family (talking mostly about my parents), I was not taught the value of helping others- sure my mom and dad gave a couple of bucks to the Jerry Lewis Telethon every year, but really helping people? Nah. That wasn't their trip. I'm not judging that (well maybe I am), but that's the way it was. Charity was not their thing. 

And my young adult life had me too frail and insecure and too emotionally wonky to realize the value of helping others, or even realize that was something I should do. I was really way too interested in helping myself, yet somehow I found it very hard to ask for help when I needed it (will get back to that in a sec). But that was then and this is now, and though I still struggle with where I'm headed and where this thing called life is going to take me, I know this- I'm going to insist upon getting involved, spreading the word, and helping others- that's a non-negotiable. And on that, lest you think I'm looking to move to Calcutta, I'm not. I think when I was younger, the "type" of people that helped people were saint like, monastic types who gave up their whole lives in order to save the children. I'm seeing as I get older that you don't have to do that, that all you have to do is put your hand up. And trust me, you don't need to be a saint to do it- if you are someone who likes to build stuff, go build stuff. If you are a good listener, go listen. If you have the soul of a fighter, then go fight against injustice. You get the idea.

This weekend I was fortunate and blessed to help out on a project for Dress for Success. If you're not familiar, it's an organization that empowers women looking to make changes in their lives by giving them the tools (and the wardrobe) to survive out there. A couple nights last week after work, I got to interview a bunch of women whose stories had me at hello. Here were women who were so strong, so open, so willing to admit that they had a problem- and it's not just drugs, alcohol, or spousal abuse, though certainly there's plenty of those stories. Whatever the story was, the common thread was seeking help, being open to others helping, and looking to not only become the best one can be, but also to pay it forward and give back once you do.  And that's when it hit me- even asking for help, admitting you may need a hand, or sharing painful stories puts something into the world that is beyond that single story- just by asking for help it means you are seeking compassion, love, and something higher than all of us. I think this revealed itself hugely when I adopted Khan, my sweet little dog. Something clicked in me that made me feel so much for this little cornflake colored terrier and his huge eyes- as morning after morning he wagged his tail at me and waited excitedly for his breakfast, I felt so blessed that I could provide food and shelter for this little guy, who never asked for a thing in return, only for me to love and care for him, and sit in my lap as often as possible. But back to my weekend.

I got to meet all of the women I chatted with on the phone when they freely told me their stories, we laughed, we cried together, we shot some beautiful photos of their beautiful faces. I can't tell you how gratifying this was, and what a wonderful organization full of strong, amazing, non-judgmental women who focus on making women feel whole. I will never say no if they need my help, and I feel so happy I have found a cause that feels aligned with my skills and passions.  And if you're not in a position where you feel like you can help others right now because you need a hand yourself, don't be afraid to find some support. You are doing something very good for the world, even bigger than you, when you do. You're bringing about understanding and love. Not everything we do to heal ourselves or make ourselves better helps pay this forward. I think my biggest issue with this whole beyond me generation we live in is the fact that it's sure great you are tracking your runs on Nike+ and that your dinner consists of organic kale, but tell me- does that help anybody but you? Yes, that's ok. Yes, that's wonderful. But what I love about seeking help or helping others is the pay it forward aspect- there is simply nothing more satisfying than knowing you impacted a life, or conjured an action into the atmosphere that can help us see the good in the face of so much terrible. Maybe like me you were not necessarily hard wired at birth to give your time, your advice, or your support to those who need it, or maybe you thought asking for help was too much of a burden or that it made you weak in an era when everyone is trying to be so damn strong. Get over either of those. Right now.

So whether you want to ask for help or give some help, know this- we are all so very overwhelmed by the tremendous plight we're finding the world in these days- we have to help each other, build community, and heal each other, so that we can then go on and help others. And if the thought of going into a full throttle compassion session is too much for you- start small. Tell someone they're beautiful. Let somebody into your lane. Start a real conversation instead of staring into your phone. It's the only way we're going to survive.  We may not be able to change that jury's verdict in Florida or bring back a teenaged boy, but we can focus on figuring out ways to help the millions of other causes we can lend our talents to- or perhaps all of this bad news has made you realize you want to  change your own life, so that you too may be in a position to help others one day. Let's not lose hope- we still all have so much to give, and sometimes by asking, you're giving. Cause that's what's up this helpful Monday in the very hot city- I felt wonderful coming to work today knowing I had spent my weekend working on something that needed my help, and in turn, helped me.  Thich Nhat Hahn said "compassion is a verb". I couldn't agree more. All the love. XO

Good afternoon, Monday. Hope all of you enjoyed some time off to celebrate the 4th. I myself feel like I'm melting and combusting. It's just too hot to bear and navigating the steamy streets of New York in such weather feels much like slugging through mud- mud that smells like urine that is. Yuck.

And as I sweat my way through the summer, I need makeup that will stay on my mug, not streak or run or clog my pores or make me sweat more than I already am. I know many of you out there go makeup free when the humidity is high as a kite, but I myself am past that point and need some bulletproof glamour on the regular- I've tested each and every one of these and think the right combo of products can keep your glow going without having an overdewed, oil slick of a face. The powder is of course, key- you must powder on top of all of your makeup to preserve and keep from beauty malfunctions. Chanel's is my fav by far- I worry that powder can be drying and somehow cause pores to look bigger than they are, but a generous sweep of this stuff is just what the doctor ordered when it comes to sweatproof coverage. 

The other products are equally covet worthy- now I'm a girl that likes makeup and am not a big believer in day and night looks- it's really what looks best on your face and on me, a smokier, more dramatic eye is fine in the daytime than a super natural one. That Laura Mercier black shadow looks super intimidating, but somehow manages to be sheer and chill and not the least bit Morticia. Neutrals tend to get lost on my  eyes, so I have to keep the drama, and I love how Laura's colors can look intense but always go on looking appropriate and not too intense. And lest you worry I'm channeling something like that lady from the Drew Carey show, fear not. My secret is to keep the lip very neutral when going big on the eyes- I don't love alot of color on my lips anyway, so way happier to work the eyes. And I've mentioned that Guerlain foundation/tint/bronzer before- it's really my fav product of all time- it feels like silk and is sheer and the perfect wash of color in place of foundation, with enough coverage to act as a tinted moisturizer. LOVE. Oh and if you're feeling a bit label minded, get a Tory Burch makeup bag. Hers last forever, and this Baja one I bought on sale at Bloomingdales a while ago has made me very happy, and looks pretty in your Summer vanity. 

Here is the link to my Polyvore board displaying all of the good stuff- with links to buy, etc. It may be hot out, but I've got the goods to still look gorg. Cause that's what's up this makeup forever kind of post holiday Monday in the 212. XO

http://www.polyvore.com/summer_makeup_bag/set?id=88675915

Hiya, Wednesday- officially off duty for a few and Happy Fourth to everyone out there- take it nice and easy, a la these two cool cats shown here being amazing in that bad ass American way that we all hold dear...let's celebrate and explore and be rebels. Cause that's what's up this Captain'd America groovy kind of Wednesday in the 212. Happy bday, sweet country 'o mine. Isn't Peter Fonda kind of the coolest dude  ever? XO

Good late am, Tuesday. Soupy again here in NY. Gah. Enough. 

Oh hey, Jerry Hall. Happy birthday you sexy thing...back in the day Jerry was the perfect 70s disco babe- tall, Texan, blonde, and married to a Rolling Stone...big kiss to Jerry today for being awesome...and that's all I've got to say on this supermodel Tuesday in the 212. XO

Good mornin'. It's Monday and rainy and yucky. This week is a maj holiday so will post when I can...but loved this photo from Gioia Magazine of Tosca Dekker (shot by Stefania Paparelli) rocking some serious Dries and Valentino. If you've wondered how to look like a patriot and do it in style, here ya go. I'd so rock this on the 4th- G-d bless America, and Dries. And Val. Three cheers for the red, white, and blue. Way to rock a look for the holiday that's not tots obvious. Love.

Cause that's what's up this mucky weather Monday in the 212, right here in the US of A. XO