the world according to sherimaven

Good morning, Thursday. It's been a week and I'm feeling sad to see the Obamas leave as many of us are. 

So I thought I'd share some of my favorite first lady looks from the Obama Presidency through the years. Michelle became a style icon and though at times i found her look a bit too "retro", I look at these pictures now and realize she is and was the epitome of confidence, strength, and easy American style. I love how comfortable she is in her own skin, and to me, her very best looks were for evening- not many can rock a formal gown like Mrs. O. And to have a beaming man by your side who worships and adores you? Well, that's the best accessory of all time.

I love the look above from her recent and last Jimmy Fallon appearance as FLOTUS. I love this Givenchy look- edgy and cool and super modern.

These two above may be two of my all time favs. So stunning. 

So let's raise our glasses to Michelle Obama and her infinitely amazing style, grace, and standing as a fabulous woman who made us all smile, tear up, and touched our hearts. A classier lady you will not find. I salute you, Michelle, and all of your choices, style and otherwise. It goes without saying how much we will miss you. Feminine, fantastic, and now, a distant memory when hope was alive and well and living at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.  Yes, you did Michelle. Yes, you did.

Cause that's what's up this all star salute of a throwback Thursday in the 212. Yours, in parting is such sweet sorrow. XO

Good afternoon, Tuesday. Gloomy one in my city today. Looking forward to an evening in.

So with many of you going to marches- either the big event in DC or the local versions in your hometowns, my mind of course goes to something really important- what to wear. Yea, I know. Maybe not the most important thing, but dressing for a revolution has had its place in pop culture and beyond since protesting became a thing. From Eleanor Roosevelt to Susan B. Anthony to Angela Davis to Gloria Steinhem and many more, dressing well and marching on go hand in hand indeed.

So I thought I'd share some looks to get you in the mood to fight for your rights. I've already seen some excellent signs being drawn by friends and excited to see people getting out there to protest this world of pain we currently inhabit. So dress accordingly.

First off, you can't talk about revolutionary fashion without talking about Vivienne Westwood. I love her. She's a huge climate change activist and has always been the quintessential revolutionary thinker, who, along with Malcolm McClaren, gave birth to punk rock in the UK and truly started a movement, fueled by piss, anger, and a whole lot of safety pins. Oh and how about when Katherine Hamnett, she of slogan tee shirt fame, first met Margaret Thatcher? Amazing.  The Brits are very good at revolutionary style. And considering they need to protest across the pond too, it's worth tipping our hats to them when it comes to defining statement dressing. As in, saying something more than a mere fashion statement for fashion's sake.

And I love Chanel's Spring/Summer show of 2015, where Karl Lagerfeld sent an impossibly chic horde of protesters down the runway for a bit of revolutionary glam. If only he had known the work we would have to do now. Love these pics I spotted on Dazed Digital. I'm obviously partial to the jumpsuits and military inspired looks. Perfect for a new version of power dressing to suit our times. 

And this Cavalli collection from 2013 played with the spirit of demonstrations- Cavalli is somehow always steeped in a more flower power moment of revolution but this all applies to where we are now. Whatever it takes.

And then look at this group of ultimate bad ass women. I'd march with them anytime. All stylish ladies, all brilliant. All passionate about protecting our rights. And I love this solo pic of Gloria Steinhem, who knows that wearing basic black is a way to get shit done. I know that too. And it makes you feel tough to boot.

And one of my favorite brands, Meg, who has a lovely shop in my neighborhood, sold out of this fabulous sweatshirt, and donated 10% of the proceeds to Planned Parenthood. Also lovely is the Suffragette tee from Claire Vivier. And when St. Vincent rocked the infamous "The Future is Female" sweatshirt, it caused an Instagram sensation and became a must have for those proud to show their female pride. According to the New York Times, "The original “The Future Is Female” T-shirt design was made for Labyris Books, the first women’s bookstore in New York City. The photographer Liza Cowan took a picture of Alix Dobkin, her girlfriend at the time, wearing it in 1975."

And though it may be too cold to rock this without layering in NY or DC, this pink jumpsuit from Rachel Comey is so perfect for a female led march. Love the color, love the "got work to do" vibe. So good.  Yea, it's spendy. Go get one from Dickies and dye it. You're welcome.

Just felt inspired to share some ways to fight the power in style, even if Chanel may seem a wee too, well, hmm. And yes, we have way more to do than just contemplate what to wear. But self expression is also a huge way to get your point across, so why not do it with style?  It matters not if you wear Chanel or flea market finds- just show up. And be your damn self. After all, it's our right.

Cause that's what's up this still a free country kind of Tuesday in the very stylish 212. Yours, in making a difference, and dressing well. Who are your favorite style revolutionaries?  XO

Good morning, Monday. Happy MLK Day, and this year, it's personal.

I think there has never been a more emotionally charged election in my lifetime. So much at stake. And now that the dust is clearing and reality bites, we need to do something. Many things. 

A Facebook friend of mine posted yesterday that we need to stand behind this President,  and stop whining and complaining. I respectfully disagreed as Trump has nowhere near earned my respect, but his point was not about the things we were whining about, but the fact that so many of us are talking and not doing. On this MLK Day, I was thinking about the importance of leadership in this revolution, which is being broadcast from our social media channels where the collective voice feels diluted and disorganized and just a cacophonous rabble with no real action just yet. Of course, the march the day after the Inauguration is a huge step. But we need the next MLK. The next Gloria Steinhem. The next Harriet Tubman or Susan B. Anthony or anyone who can lead the charge to keep our rights exactly where they belong, with us. This is a democracy, kids. We must fight this.

Truth is, many of us don't know what to do, because we've never had to do this much to defend ourselves and our rights.  I can think of no time in my life where I have had to truly fight for my rights as an American. But that time is now. And I don't think I"m being a dramatic liberal here. Millions of Americans are in danger of losing their healthcare, their freedom of choice, their identity. What this movement needs is leadership and I'm praying people come forward to help motivate, organize, and make the right kind of noise. Maybe it's Bernie. Maybe it's Hillary. I'm not sure who it is right now but praying somebody or a few somebodies come forward to help. 

Because what MLK gave this country and lost his life for was equal rights. Civil rights. Human rights. MLK was around before many of us were born, and feeling like his message is more important than ever. And it never went away. It's just right now I'm scared we're all talking too much because honestly- none of us know how to do this. None of us have ever felt such a deep need to protest. And all of us need a leader, who, if not the President, is someone who fights for America. We are at our best when we rebel. When we speak our minds. When we fight tyranny.  Trump's claims of patriotism stand against everything I believe in. And don't represent American values. If you feel the same, we must fight together. But we need a leader. And hope we have one as these days turn into nights and years. (I doubt it will be years but that's another story).

So happy birthday to MLK and here's hoping his spirit rises and ignites in someone ready to fight. Many of us are ready to be soldiers, but we need a general. Cause that's what's up this is not over, just beginning kind of Monday in the 718. Yours, in having a dream, and keeping it alive. XO

Hey, Friday. So glad you're here. SO GLAD. And a long weekend to boot.

So clearly there's a lot of bad crazy stuff happening and we're all feeling stressed, but it was a nice diversion to be angry about something else, that is, something other than the impending Cheeto in Chief.

I spotted an article on Vogue.com this am about Bella Hadid, sister of Gigi, and together, the two of them are big models commanding huge salaries and shaking their asses all over the place for Victoria's Secret and beyond. They're beautiful girls, there's no doubt. They get paid to be beautiful. So why on earth does Bella Hadid feel the need to post a picture on Instagram of her admittedly hot body and Vogue interprets it as a "revenge" body photo? In care you're not up on the latest gossip- Bella's ex is now dating Selena Gomez, and apparently there's drama. But a revenge body? WTF?

Khloe Kardashian is arguably the owner of this term of late. She has a whole show about it, called, appropriately, Revenge Body with Khloe Kardashian. Where women lose weight so they can presumably give the well toned middle finger to anyone that hurt, wrong, or shamed them when they were heavier. I don't get it. I don't get how any woman could think this is a good idea. Lose weight to be healthy. Lose weight to feel good. For yourself. Not to take revenge on someone who doesn't love you anymore. That's the most insecure and stupid thing I have ever heard. And what an awful message to send to young girls and women in general, who struggle with body issues more than ever because of Instagram and every other message thrown at us that says we must strive for perfection when it comes to our bodies.This has to stop. No woman should ever utter the word "revenge body". I know I just did, but never utter it as an aspirational phrase. Ever. Can you imagine Hillary Clinton posting a selfie with her revenge body? Admittedly she had a pretty shit year. But yea, she's not going to do that. Because she has a brain. And more women need to believe in themselves as genius human beings vs. just being exceptionally toned. That's nice, of course. But you get my drift.

Do I feel better when I fit in my jeans? Yea. Of course I do. We all do. And if you don't care whether you fit in your jeans, well good on you.

But to show your body as a way of seeking revenge is disgusting. And that's that. And if you think that getting back at somebody by having a tight ass is a legit thing, then I think you should focus on getting your head right vs. your body, cause that's messed up yo. It's great to get in shape if you are going through a hard time, but do it for you, ok boo? 

Cause that's what's up this taking revenge on revenge bodies kind of Friday in the 212. Yours in long weekends, and not losing control of the plot. XO

Good morning, friends. I'm feeling super depleted and fatigued from well, the world. Yes, that's broad. But really- I have a wonderful personal life, full of friends and family and a loving husband, I'm reasonably healthy and am finally closing in on the career I've always wanted, working with people I believe in and would bring into battle with me any day of the week. But in a larger sense, I can't help but feel horribly sad and scared for what's to come in this country. Because shit's about to get really weird. And there's no time to sleep.

I watched the President's closing remarks last night and cried like a baby. I cried when he got elected, and I cried when he said goodbye. I cried for different reasons in those cases- he "yes we canned" his way into our hearts and minds and the future never looked brighter. I cried because a black President was unprecedented. A young President filled me with hope. A President who was a real human being felt inspired and even though I fear change, felt like change I could be truly excited about. And it's for those same reason my tears of joy turned to tears of sadness last night. Because that's not who we elected to run the country next. And this all happened while we were sleeping.

Because under the guise of gay marriage, strong females like Michelle, a world seemingly more connected than ever before, we were sleeping.

Because as we shared photos of our brunch on Instagram and shared videos of Grumpy Cat and aligned in our bubbles over our progressive values, we were sleeping.

Because as some of us were Berners and some of us were with her and had the tee shirt to prove it, we were sleeping.

And then, just like that, we wished we could go back to bed.

Because the man who is coming into the White House does not deserve to be there. He is not qualified, not dignified, not even particularly smart. He detaches himself from the American people by being snarky on Twitter, a mode of communique that allows him to engage in mean spirited, childish displays of arrogance as he hides behind a mobile device or monitor.

Because my mind can't process how he got here, or how we got here. Because I wonder how we could have done more. How I could have done more. Because it doesn't matter if Trump is a racist, a homophobe, a nationalist, or a fan of golden showers. Because somehow he seems immune to all of it and it makes some sycophant of a fan base rally behind him even more. Because Putin has shit on him now and is playing him like a marionette.

Because as we were sleeping, we let the promise of change slip through our fingers. Because even though we had a Black President and gay weddings, we were not there yet. We were asleep at the wheel when "yes we can" became "no we can't".

Because we don't give psychiatric evaluations to those who hold the most important job in our nation, and arguably, the world. 

Because the bad guys won. Because we were not raised to behave this way.  Because we are Americans. And because now that means absolutely nothing. Because the man who made it mean something is leaving the building.

We must have been sleeping to let a man like Obama leave office, a man who gave it his all and whose hair turned grey doing it, and slap him in the face because scorching racism and sexism and xenophobia is alive and well by electing a terrifying, pathetic man who lives in a gilded, vulgar tower and lacks compassion or empathy. We must have been sleeping to believe that said pathetic man could "make America great again".  Because only the sleeping masses could discount the fact that our economy has turned around, and that our rights are intact despite many obvious problems like gun control and foreign enemies and a rise in police brutality.

Sure, some of you were awake. I was half asleep. Because I believed without a shadow of a doubt that this would not happen. And now it's happening. And I'm not sure where we go from here. And many who are glass half full types are trying to console themselves by noting that this psycho could be a good President because he built a skating rink in record time in Central Park. Yea, I know. l want to go back to bed now too. But we can't.

Because he's not even in the White House yet and look at the mess he's made. (Not talking about the piss stained sheets in the Presidential suite in Russia either).

We've got to stay awake and do whatever it takes to protect our rights. I can't for the life of me understand why people hate Obama so much. You don't have to agree with everything your President does- but how or why hate a man that clearly cares about the American people in a way that most Presidents have not? How can you hate a person whose wife is a role model for women everywhere? How can you hate someone who represents your supposed "family values" to perfection? Because while we were sleeping, this country was not ready to have a black President, and that makes me very sad. And because even though he was in the White House for 8 years, we fell asleep halfway through and should have been alert enough to realize having him gone would be a huge challenge to a progressive agenda that was inclusive of not just some, but all.

I have never felt more emotionally invested in an election. I have always had eagle eyes on politics but when Obama got elected, it transcended politics and Washington for me. Because for the first time we had a President in my lifetime whose values felt in step with where we ought to be headed. I somehow can't believe we are headed for an administration that may very well take us back to a place of fear and tyranny. Because this is what happens when we oversleep. We miss shit. And now we need to run very fast because the alarm clock went off and we need to get to work. Now. 

So go on your march. Sign that petition. Do whatever you can. As the reality and gravitas of the end of this Presidency became super real last night, I wanted to crawl under the duvet and stay there but I realized that's why we're here. And now is not the time to sleep. Officially awake. Are you?

PS- I'm making a real attempt to stay off of Facebook these days. My posts will still go up there but don't expect a ton of engagement from me there. It's just too much and not helping and until there's real action due to the magic of social media, I don't care about it anymore. I will continue to get my pretty picture dose from Instagram because I enjoy the lack of anger there. I'm angry enough, and somehow, Facebook makes it worse for me. It doesn't motivate me at all. In fact, it's debilitating.

I'm not sure I can watch the Inauguration. But if I'm not doing that, I better be doing something to keep my blood flowing and my energy level up. I'm fired up. Right now I'm full of fear and lack any hope and truly believe this is America's bottom. I can only hope we pull ourselves up from here and rise from the ashes and never let this happen again.

Cause that's what's up this sleep no more kind of Wednesday in the 212. Yours, in eyes wide open. XO

Good morning, Monday. Howzit? It's cold in NYC and I'm snuggled into my Monday and getting down to it.

Of course you know I watched the Globes last night and obviously I looked at all the glamour. Just so you know, I only care about Michelle Williams- her lack of artifice and bling and short hair was life affirming (yes I'm weird) and Emma Stone is just the perfect winner of the evening in a star studded dress (literally) by Valentino. Perfection.

But what really got me going and oohing and aahing were not the gowns, but the tuxedos. On the dudes. The dudes won fashion at the Globes this year and that's that.

Glover in his brown tux. Gucci. Very cool.

Gosling in his white dinner jacket. Gucci. Good stuff.

Hemsworth. Reynolds. Hamm. Patel. PINE. Yes he gets caps. He's gorgeous. End of story.

Reynolds or Gosling? Reynolds or Gosling? The mind wanders.

Timberlake. Legend. Mr. Robot. All of them. Gorgeous. Rugged. Bearded. Gorgeous.

And the beard parade was so the thing last night. And I don't mind it. In fact, I quite like it.

The ladies? Meh. No beards, of course. But meh. Whatever.

Nicole Kidman just needs to stop. Stop everything. She must never put another needle into her face. Insanity. And Drew Barrymore's face looked super weirdsville too, as did many of the ladies who were just trying too damn hard and injecting too many things into their mugs- from too much side boob, front boob, boob in general. Desperate. I hated it. I literally felt pain for Amy Adams in that sausage casing of a Tom Ford dress. No woman should be suffocated by her own skin the way Amy was last night. Hated it. 

Sure some ladies looked pretty- Mandy Moore was a beauty, for instance in navy blue. And Ruth Negga looked super modern in a zipped up look by Louis Vuitton, who killed it on the red carpet for the women as Gucci did for the men. But then came Meryl, and really, after Meryl, nothing else mattered.

It's true sometimes I roll my eyes over all the Meryl madness that inevitably surrounds every awards show. But her words as she accepted her globe were indeed, golden. They set the tone. They were responsible. And they spoke to our collective anxiety as a creative class and country which has always celebrated diversity. I'll never forget that speech- her confidence saying the words as the audience sat in rapt adoration and attention. And yes, as expected, the social media universe exploded with updates and tweets of "Meryl 2020". Why not? Why the heck not? If a reality star can become President, why not a real national treasure? I love you, Meryl. Don't change. Don't try to sausage yourself into a dress or remove the features from your face with too many fillers. We love you just the way you are.

So the takeaway from last night? Since Lala Land was the big winner, it's clear this country needs a happy dance number once in a while to get back in step. And that men had a real moment last night, as did Meryl, who shined brighter than any of the other ladies there because she used her smarts over her sex appeal to steal the show. And really, what's sexier than that?

Also the ladies who won for me last night were not overly sexed up, tarted up, glammed up. They were charming. Little Eleven looked delightful, Emma as mentioned, Michelle Williams, and of course, Meryl. All charming lovely ladies not overly indulgent when it comes to being uber sexed up, dolled up, tarted up. And that's why the men looked fab too- simple tux shape with a bit of character aka a beard? Instant charm. Perhaps in an uncertain world charm is more important than va voom? Just a thought. Even Kim Kardashian is toning it down these days. 

Cause that's what's up this post Globe Monday in the 212. Yours, in using your words and charmed, I'm sure. XO

Hey, Thursday. How you livin'? It's cold in New York but I'm feeling cozy and living my best hygge life. For those of you not on the trend train, hygge is very much a thing right now (I mean if the NY Times says it)- it's a Danish word for those things that embody coziness- think warm cocoa, knit caps, fuzzy anything. Think of the embodiment of a good hug from a good friend. Or a hot cup of tea with lots of honey and lemon. Or warm chocolate cake. Or puppy breath. You get it. You get it. I know you do.

I've always been a cozy kind of chick. I love nesting at home, snuggling in, and feeling a chill in the air. So here's five of my favorite hygge like things I want and need right now to embrace all that is this lovely trend. Minimalists are cool and all, but I'm a cozy lady and that's that. I'm not great at super modern and spare, I'm not great at over the top and opulent, but I'm good at hygge. This much I know. Just come over and you'll see what I mean. 

Love this pullover from Free People. Nuzzle in to it and immediately cozy. So nice.

And if you're home chilling, you need pjs. I mean. Come on. I adore Sleepy Jones as you know and they embody hygge to the hilt. I love the men's flannel pjs for my own use- so great and on sale now on their site. Also cute are the long sleeved stripe tees and bottoms. 

On a whole other tip, I am in love with this rain cape from Japanese brand Postal Co. It's such a chic way to make a rainy day all the more comfy and cozy. And you can wear a great leather jacket underneath or big furry sweater. Love.

Oh and seriously we know a candle is a must for this trend to really hit home. I've always been a huge Diptyque Baies girl, but recently I've switched it up to Feu de Bois after buying one as a gift for a pal this holiday season. It is the epitome of firewood goodness. I love love love it and it's the best scent for cold nights curled up. If you don't have a fireplace, this scent will surely do the trick. 

Also, and I know I've posted these before, but these French wool striped slippers from Armor Lux are pretty much everything. Mine are worn and chewed and crazy looking but I adore them more each day. Perfection for padding around the house. I'm not one for socks per se so I love wearing slippers at home. 

So as the temps drop and the daylight gets spare, just get to creating some cozy in your life. I adore it. I'll do some more things I love for the home on another day but thought I would start with ways to embody the trend, with the candle as a great and easy start to channeling that excellent hygge goodness. Cause that's what's up this nesty Thursday in chilly New York. Yours, in free hugs and warm drinks. XO

Good morning, Wednesday. Officially back in the saddle. I don't mind. Feels fine besides the getting up early bit. ;)

So we might as well just dive right in and talk about shoes. It's never too early or too late to think about important matters like footwear, and I've got mules on my mind.

Gucci absolutely spearheaded a love for all things mule- you can't walk very far in New York without seeing a gal or guy (yes guy) rocking the horsebit with an exposed heel. So when I came across these from OG favorite sandal brand Mystique, I fell in love. I've always been a Mystique fan since living in Miami- a jeweled sandal is never a bad idea.

But check these awesome well muled versions- I'm a fan of the python Camden most of all but some of the jeweled ones are great for fancy dress that feels casual (though I wish the Camden had a pointed toe but whatevs). A perfect shoe for a dinner party where you are the hostess. Or velvet is great with a cropped jean and button down to give a little laid back glam.

Just wanted to share a good find, and a flat find as well. It's nice to find something that feels a bit dressed up that's not going to cause any pain. Life is short, after all. Why wear painful shoes? 

Cause that's what's up this non heeled Wednesday in the best city on Earth. Yours, in staying grounded, and landing flat on my feet. XO

Good morning, Tuesday. I'm still home enjoying my last 24 hours of chillness. I don't mind. Many of you went back today and all of us will most likely be back tomorrow, so as we level set for 2017, work is obviously top of mind. Some of you are working in offices with many people, some are armies of one like me who are choosing to make their own way. Regardless, work is often a stressful endeavor. They don't call it "work" for nothing, right?

So my husband sent me this amazing Ted like talk by Simon Sinek, about everyone's favorite workplace topic, millenials. Oh, millenials. You must watch this interview. It's great. 

I don't know a single trend person, marketing person, or really any person who has not been flummoxed, fascinated, or frustrated by this demographic. I myself have been intrigued by them and am the first to admit that I enjoy the company of young people and love their energy, enthusiasm, and wide eyes. But one very important thing Sinek notes is that millenials, although lovely, lovely people who believe in changing the world, don't have any tools to deal with something very important. And that's stress.

I'll let you watch the vid, but Sinek blames their parents and of course, too much time online, as the culprits for why this demographic is bad at stress. As a freelancer, I've come across it more times than I can share- it matters not where or how many people or how much free food or yoga classes there are on offer. There is a pandemic amongst this group and their inability to deal. In my career, I would have been shot (ok maybe not but fired) for such an offense. Because like it or not, it's not that my generation or any other generation knew how better to deal with stress, but we had very little choice. Because we had to. Oh and big surprise- my parents did not teach me how to cope with problems or deal with stress. At all. So I don't buy that bit as much because I taught myself how to do it. Because I needed to eat and pay rent and survive. 

Cut to now- where arguably there are more stress management tools at our fingertips than ever before. There's apps for yoga and meditation everywhere. We can now wear yoga pants to work so we can go to yoga class after work. As a group, millenials eat better and healthier than any group I have ever seen. In fact, they shut down when they can't get something green in their bodies. We practice mindfulness and strive for balance and look to our employers to take care of us.  And sure this stress management movement came out of far too much stress, but in my mind, it's not really helping. It's kind of just stoking the flames. I admit my approach to stress has not always been sound or healthy, but just because you're doing more yoga does not in any way guarantee you are better suited to deal with stress.

I remember very clearly in my 20s working for people that had no patience for hysterics or my work/life balance. Not a single one.

And sure I remember crying in a closet and feeling overwhelmed, but guess what? I dealt with it. Because I had to. I'm not sure why anyone thinks otherwise. And though I sympathize with a lack of coping skills, I don't have a ton of patience for it. I'm not advocating for martyrdom or pure selflessness at work, but sometimes, ok many times, you have to put your own ya yas aside and do what's best for the team. Or the task. Or whatever. To me, that's what is often missing from the millenial mindset- it's not laziness as some people see it- it's just an inability to think big picture, and maybe it's because of so much of this "be here now" movement we've all embraced. Because when it comes to work, you can't always just be here now. You need to be ten steps ahead. As a producer, that has always been my job. Anticipating. I often think today's young workplace is so caught up in the moment of chaos they can't see anything ahead of them. That's the best way to navigate stress. To plan ahead because even though everything is in a swirling tornado, eventually you're going to have to rebuild your house. And if you're too focused on how to navigate the swirl and not looking forward, no bueno, friends. I know this sounds completely weird to some of you, but I thrive on stress. I don't want it to put me in an early grave, but I've come to love problem solving and am even slightly suspicious when things are going "perfectly". Stress can be energizing in a way- as long as it's not totally toxic. How to avoid that? Everyone needs to get onboard and not fall down. Perhaps it's my Eastern European/Jewish DNA, but I'm ok with everything not being easy and more often than not, hard.  Because I was raised (right or wrong) that life is often about suffering, and because of that, it makes time off so much more special. Call me crazy, but I like to earn time off. And nice things. And license to wear pajamas for days on end.  A stressful project always makes me appreciate what I have that much more. But that's just me.

I love Sinek's take on millenials at work, but I'm not sure I fully agree it is our responsibility to teach them to deal with stress. I do believe we need to accommodate their need for balance, but we can't be their parents. At least I don't want to be. I don't have kids. So...Plus Sinek advocates for less time online and on our screens, and though I can't imagine that will happen, I would like to see more people engaged in actual conversations and less IM/status updates/email recaps. Ain't nothing like the real thing baby. I also understand that in a world of instant gratification, patience is not a virtue anymore. It should be. It needs to be. Success takes time. Stress management takes time. Building strong relationships take time. There's no real app for any of those things, incidentally. 

And though I've embraced meditation myself to deal with the work/life willies, it does not change the fact that there will be stress. And it's not just meditation that is going to help me deal with that- it's planning ahead despite the chaos of modern work and looking at the big picture and knowing it's not always just about me. PS- not a bad strategy in relationships either- another area where millenials often fall down. In my experience, millenials think about the future in a very different way. I worry they will consistently be unhappy with work when it gets tough- maybe that will lead to more entrepreneurs which is great, but who will then prepare the next generation for challenging times? Even if you switch careers from say, advertising to owning your own flower shop, you're gonna have stress. And that's that. Because as the quote at the top of my post notes, this stress is going to propel you forward. So stop trying to get rid of it, and embrace it and stare it straight in the face. Then punch it in the neck.

So as I finish out my happy little holiday, I'm sure this year will be full of challenges and stress. I may not always deal with either of those things perfectly, but you better believe I'll cope, the best way I know how. To not get bogged down by the situation and focus more deeply on how to come out the other way, however and whatever it takes to get there. Toughen up, millenials. You'll never make it otherwise, even with all the yoga, meditation, and green juice you can imbibe. Realize that work is hard and life is hard and though I very much believe in balance, I also believe in the big picture and my role in it, and how much sweeter it can be on the other side of the storm if you throw yourself in headfirst. And sure, I'm super relaxed right now and most likely won't be tomorrow, but I'm ok with that.  There's no doubt it's going to be a stressful year, and all we can do is ride out the storm, because when it comes to work, the calm almost always inevitably comes. I'm not always great at it, ps. But I realize it's part of life and no longer melt down in closets.  And that's what's up this back to work Tuesday in the 718. Yours, in stress management and coping skills. Namaste. XO

 

Good late morning first Monday in 2017. Picking up where I left off is never easy in the new year, but I'm feeling strong and rested and generally happy with what's to come, besides the obvious impending inauguration. On a personal level, I feel good. On a global level? I'm terrified. OK, enough of that. We all are. Case closed. I hope we all can join together and cope.

So perhaps a bit of a cliche, but starting the new year fresh is important.  Sure you can eat right, exercise, stop drinking, blah blah blah. But how about smelling good? As in not stinking? That should be a fairly attainable goal. 

And I've found the holy grail. Let me preface by saying I am not always a believer in organic and all natural and such. Chemicals tend to work better when it comes to erasing wrinkles and puffiness and curing a stomach ache. I don't pretend to only eat organic, and most of my makeup is not free of sketchy ingredients. But I have been searching for a minute for a deodorant that is aluminum and paraben free because I've read so much of late about the harmful effects. And though I live for my Fresh deodorant, I've always been on the hunt for something better and healthier.

I've tried many, mind you. From L'Occitane to Lavanila to a million others (except that horrid crystal bullshit) and really- none of them work if you have an active life. Natural deodorant and working out don't really seem to mix- until now.  So on my Instagram feed the other day, an ad came up for Native deodorant, and thought I'd give it a try. I've been using it for a week and it is the absolute best paraben and aluminum free deodorant around- and it smells like a dream. I got the coconut and vanilla one and it is amazing. I've sweated through yoga and barre and New York radiator heat and all is well. It's true I have not yet taken a boxing class (getting back to that this year), but if you've been looking for a better alternative to toxic deodorant, go get this. Now. And at 12 bucks, it's not super cheap but also not out of the realm. PS it's a stick deodorant which you may have to get used to if you're more of a roll on type, but it's worth it. Starting the new year fresh and such. Give it a go. It works. And it's a keeper. And it's made in the US of A.

It may seem I've devoted entirely too many words to chat with you about deodorant, but I'm obsessed with smell and sensitive to funk so something that is healthy and works? I'll wax on. And on.

Cause that's what's up this going Native kind of Monday in the 718. Yours, in smelling good and keeping it fresh in 2017. XO