the world according to sherimaven

Good morning, Friday. It's a beautiful day in New York- the kind that makes you wonder how you are lucky enough to live in such a vital and vibrant place.

Let's get right to it.  It's my birthday, y'all.

It's hard not to get a bit self-reflective, though I'd rather be laying in the sweet Summer sun.

l've been thinking much lately about how we assess value in ourselves as the world has changed so much when it comes to work and collaboration. Much has been made of that latter term- you can't turn a page in a magazine or click a link on a business blog that doesn't reference the collaborative economy in which we have found ourselves.

I for one welcome it, even though I think of myself as the type who prefers to work alone, like a spy or assassin or some other made up badass in action movies. But truly I love working with people who share an enthusiasm for ideas and inspiration. As a producer, one has to be the ultimate collaborator, by bringing all the parts together to make the magic happen. It's time for all of us to channel that spirit in this very new economy we are facing, where nothing old is new again. And new just keeps happening, and will continue to do so.  Why fight that?

I bring this up because those Instagram accounts you follow and those blogs you read are becoming important for more than just fashion advice or apartment envy. With the power of social behind them, these bright young things are demanding recognition and compensation that equates with their level of influence and ability to set the pace.  With many of us looking for new ways to communicate with an audience, look no further than that guy who takes pictures of dogs in Brooklyn. He's seen as a potential collaborator not just for his urban canine picture taking chops, but because he wields influence and in many ways, is the media itself. It's no longer about taking pictures or pimping out a brand or hash tagging your posts. It's so much more that that and it's all becoming one big 360 degree channel where everyone has a stake and everyone can collaborate. And I realize how much better life is when you let people in, when you work together to learn, sweat, and create. That's not to say you become a sheep, in fact, I believe it's more important than ever to have a strong and unique point of view.  The more you create a strong identity, the more people want to hang with you. Fact.  

But what does this all mean, anyway?  It means that it's smart to figure out the best path for collaboration, and to think differently about what you have to offer. It's not enough to be an employee, worker bee, producer, writer, or insert any title any more. It's more important to think about ourselves as collaborators, particularly those of us in the freelance life have a huge opportunity to make something more of our current valuation. I feel like we recently cruised through an era of generalists, into a brave new world of holistic collaboration. A mouthful, but the more I think about it, the more I see that the best played hands include more than one deck of cards. 

I may not have the equity of millions of followers on Instagram, but you never know what rethinking your talents can do for your profile. It's time for all of us to think in new ways and enjoy happy accidents and chance encounters that lead us somewhere great.  Call it an educated attempt at serendipity. I get very caught up in I should be a writer, I should do trends, I should make dog clothes, etc. and etc. But really, I much prefer the idea of a little of this and a little of that and a whole lot of the common theme of not the type of work I do, but the type of people I work with- great friends and heroes and gurus and future pals I can connect with and believe in and who want to make great things. After all, we are all in this together, figuring it out as we go. Imagine how much better the world could be if only we would work together.

And although my next (ad)venture is a bit of an at the moment airball, I'm lucky to have some stable ground in my home life with the hubs and the fur face, my continued love of my favorite city in which I am fortunate to live, and my continued goal of striving for better human status- whether that's getting more involved in some causes I believe in or exploring new places or workouts or whatever it is that can teach me something new. My desire for that is a constant, and to me, that's something I can't put a valuation on, because it's priceless. 

I'm talking about work because I'm trying to avoid talking about botox, midlife crises, or any of that other noise. Besides all of that, there's no time like right this very minute now. I'm lucky to be here. Cause that's what's up this well aged Thursday in the best city in the world. Yours, in one more year. Let's play.  Hoping we can celebrate together very soon. Because together, we're better. XO 

Good afternoon, friends. So it’s my birthday week and I thought it would be fun to share some stories form the past, to show how very far I’ve come.

In 1993, I moved to New York on my birthday from Philadelphia, with a moving fan full of tattooed musicians toting my minimal furniture and big dreams. I did not know my roommate, did not know much about where to live or what to do, but knew I would be sleeping in the living room of a shared one bedroom on the Upper East Side.

It seemed like only seconds had passed before I knew that New York was going to be more than a place. It was going to be my place. It felt familiar and fabulous and somehow, uniquely mine. I loved every minute of being here- from making new friends very quickly to crazy party nights to imagining myself hangliding down Third Avenue. I loved it all, and in the most romantic of ways.

And something else I romanticized was realizing my lifelong dream of working in fashion. As a child, there was little doubt that somehow I’d end up working in fashion- as either a writer or illustrator or possibly a designer. I never realized there were other things. And throughout the years of sharing my love of fashion on this blog, many have asked why it is I never pursued a career there. 

And though I started my career journey in New York in advertising (a small agency downtown), my dreams were realized when I somehow landed a job at Donna Karan- my heroine, my idol, my happy place. I was hired to be the assistant to a woman who was Donna’s Director of Inspiration- and you would think with a job that has you traveling the globe running around to flea markets and vintage stores to inspire the boss, you’d be happy. Right? Wrong.

This woman. OMG. 

 I can only describe her presentation as severe. Jet black bob. Jet black nails. Jet black lips. Only black clothes. Gobs and gobs of jewelry.  And what appeared to be a black heart. This woman was so insanely mean to me. If you have ever been to the offices of Donna Karan (of course this was years ago), they are not quite as glam as you may think. From what I recall, we sat with the designers and many, many mice. The space was huge and cavernous and weird. My black death shrouded boss had a rule that whenever her boyfriend Jorge (Jorge was very, very young ps) would call, I had to find her. HAD TO.

This was long before IM, texting, or any other kind of convenient "need you now" systems. When you needed someone, you had to find them. Physically. Imagine that.

So inevitably while I was sorting through Madame's lunch order one day, Jorge rang to say hello. Immediately, I went on the hunt for my boss. And after dodging mouse traps and working up a fierce sweat, I had no luck. She was nowhere to be found. 

Dejectedly, I told him I could not find her and I'd have her call him back the second I could. Jorge was charming and sweet about all of it, and most likely relieved that he did not have to speak with her. But just as I was hanging out, in she walked. And when I told her she missed his call, she proceeded to turn into Linda Blair from the "Exorcist". For the next two hours. I sat crouched in the corner shielding myself from her vitriol as she chomped salad and screamed at me. She was a very messy eater.  I tried so hard not to cry.

But cry I did, and after that, I quit. There was simply no way I was ready to deal with this level of cuckoo. My glamorous dreams of a life in fashion in New York City quickly turned to fairy dust. 

Had I known then that someone like this would never be able to throw me now, perhaps I would have stuck with it. I'm not sure there is a job I would rather have now than inspiring designers to create.  If only. Most of us think about the one who got away- in my life, I'd say it was this job. True it could have led me to a lifetime drug addiction or a life chasing the front row of a fashion show dressed as some sort of goth poltergeist, it's hard not to think about how different it all could have been. 

And as I look down at my own outfit today- black dress, more than enough jewelry and some outsized glasses, I'm not that far from her look I suppose, which both scares me and makes me laugh. It's true I ended up in advertising and worked with some outsized egos, but generally, people in our crowd are nicer than people in fashion, and that's the truth.  Years later, I ran into this boss at a Kabbalah meeting which I reluctantly attended with a friend of mine at Showroom Seven. It was a real moment in time, and if you were in New York in those years when everyone wore a red string bracelet, you know what I mean. Madonna was there. Sandy B. was there. And this lady was there- stretched out on a chaise and looking every bit as bizarre as she did when we first met. It's not surprising she did not remember me- I was the girl who couldn't find her when her cougar prey was calling. I'm sure it was not the first time. And I'm guessing it would not be the last. You try to find someone in that maze of cray, without the benefits of technology. Go ahead.

I'm not sure if this lady is still inspiring Donna, though I have seen pieces about her throughout the years, and now I laugh at the fact I was so terrified of this eccentric Jewish woman who also hailed from Philadelphia, and now as I approach the age she most likely was when I met her, am I really that different than she was?  Why did she scare me? Or maybe I was really smart enough to see that a lifetime in fashion would only lead to despair, and admiring it from afar was more my path.  I guess what I'm saying is I wish I had some of my strength then that I have now. It's amazing what living a full life can do. And maybe she did inspire me after all, because I think she really did show me a thing or two. She showed me that being a successful woman did not mean yelling at people. Or having a cliched boy toy. Or covering up insecurity with too much jewelry. She showed me that this was not a woman I ever wanted to be, even if it meant having the supposed job of my dreams. It simply wasn't worth it to me.

Now that my birthday approaches and I think about myself no longer the scared, shy person I was, I know that people like this are always there to test you- to test your mettle, your strength, your piece of mind. There will always be challenging people and situations but they throw me less as I get older and have the perspective to cope. I'm not sure I'd tolerate this woman any better today, but my reasons for abandoning ship would probably be different- because every second counts and I don't like to surround myself with people like that. I probably knew that then ps- I just didn't have the confidence to think of it that way or understand that she too, would pass.

Just wanted to share that little moment from my life- I'm not one for nostalgia, but sometimes you can't help and look back as you're moving very much forward. Cause that's what's up this right here, right now kind of Tuesday in New York.  Yours, in the devil wore Donna. XO

PS if you are in fashion or follow fashion you may know this woman, who truly was one of a kind. I apologize if you love, worship, or are friends with her. Maybe at this point in my life I would be too, but probably not. Namaste.

Good morning, Monday. What a lovely weekend with friends. Yesterday afternoon at the East Village Standard definitely a highlight. Much to be said for late afternoon cocktails on a warm Sunday with fun people. I highly recommend it.

And while I'm busy recommending daytime drinking, I'm also going to reco an amazing new designer that all the fashion types are talking about- Vita Kin, who crafts traditional Ukrainian pieces for a discerning crowd. The most iconic is the folkloric dresses she custom makes for the likes of Leandra Medine and Alexa Chung. According to a piece in Vogue on her recent success, Kim notes “Ukrainians have a unique method of decorating clothing with embroidery, and that’s always impressed me. I adapted this ancient heritage into a modern context, adding a seventies vibe, when clothing was more relaxed and friendly. It’s a bohemian eccentricity in a very luxe execution." 

Just how luxe you ask? It's unclear, but judging from where she's selling said frocks, we're not talking "local" charm. Look for her pieces in the Fall at Net-a-Porter and Matches Fashion. I'm a humble fan. I love ethnic inspired clothing- a great way to take your tired festival fashion to a whole new fabulous place. I did spot an old listing for one of her dresses and we're talking in the thousands, but perhaps we can hunt for some vintage pieces that are slightly more down to Earth when it comes to price? I am such a fan of dresses like this in the summer with sandals, and with tights and high boots and faux fur in the winter time for something that feels very vintage YSL from the 70s. There is not a wardrobe alive that can't benefit from some piece of peasant/ethnic/boho charm. It's nice, that.

Read all about the rise of Ukrainian fashion in the Vogue piece here. It's no secret the Ukraine has been in the news a lot lately, but it's nice to see that culture being celebrated by designers and making a global impact, one dress at a time. Cause that's what's up this ethnically inclined Monday in the 212. Yours, in next level boho chic. XO

Good morning, kittens. It's Friday in New York City and I'm excited for an ambitiously social weekend. Ambitious because my natural tendency is to be a bit of a hermit crab, but I'm going for it. 

So I have so much to talk about but really, all I want is a drink. And most likely, you're ready for one too, so let's have at it.

There were a few post SATC cosmo swilling moments where vodka drinks became super unstylish. Gin was always in and we all know getting down with brown (from bourbon to mezcal) is now the spirit of choice for the hyper bearded set. But for me, I'm feeling very much in a vodka mood of late, and since it's Summer and I need to cool off, behold my favorite cocktail of yesteryear- the gimlet. Vodka, please.

A gin gimlet is also lovely but I prefer vodka. Plus the gimlet is such a simple pleasure if it's done properly. Equal parts fresh and Rose's lime juice, some ice cold vodka, and a lime. Done. 

 I sourced an article from 2002 that the Times published about the humble gimlet, and it's a keeper. From the piece:

"The gimlet's logic seems clear to me: gin or vodka, with Rose's Lime Juice and fresh lime juice in equal parts, shaken or stirred until ice cold and served straight up in a stemmed cocktail glass that is confident but not proud of its sex appeal. A standard martini glass with a light weight does nicely. The garnish -- and a gimlet should have it (it's green water without one) -- is a thin crescent moon of lime, floated in the drink invitingly, not perched on the side like a timid swimmer looking at a cold lake. Making a gimlet icy gives it smoothness when sipped."

Love this logic and will most likely employ it tonight. The piece goes on to note that the secret to a great gimlet is having the liquor be ice cold- having grown up in a family where there was always a bottle of Stoli in the freeze, I'm all about it. Sure there are a million variations now that add club soda or basil infusions, but I'm going pure and classic with mine, right down to serving it in a classic martini glass, though I'm not mad at a gimlet on the rocks in a tumbler either.

Here's the recipe from the article- perfection- with either vodka or gin:

VODKA/GIN GIMLET

From Fifty Seven Fifty Seven Bar at the Four Seasons Hotel

4 ounces vodka (or gin if you insist)

1/2 ounce fresh lime juice

1/2 ounce Rose's Lime Juice

1 thin lime wedge.

Combine liquid ingredients in a cocktail shaker with ice. Shake, and strain into a martini glass. Garnish with lime wedge.

Yield: 1 serving.

I'll have two. Cause that's what's up this never too early for cocktails kind of summer Friday in NYC. Yours, in healthy pours. XO

Good afternoon, Thursday. I'm sensing a major binge watch night of television tonight and some comfort food. This gloomy weather has me feeling all blah, but not in a bad way. Just a lazy one. I can't be asked today. Like, at all.

But besides my lethargy, I realize that of late I come off as quite the fashion minimalist, which I am, but more often than not, a need for something more fun sneaks in. Enter my enduring love of drants. Or dress over pants for the uninitiated or hater of fashion trend jargon.

I first remember seeing women wearing dresses over pants in the 90s in Amsterdam, where those lovely ladies wear such garb so they can freely bike around the city. So think of a feminine vibe, but practical. I like such things. 

I also know a thing or two about what looks good on me, and for some reason, I tend to look good in trickier, riskier pieces. Not that the dress over pants is one of those, but it's definitely not a look embraced by girls who shop at Brooks Brothers. (Yes, people shop there). I've rocked this look for years and will continue to do so- from sheer long tunics with jeans to shorter babydoll dresses with skinny jeans. Been there. Worn that. And would happily go there again.

For me, I love how boho this look can feel, yet somehow very modern and utilitarian.You can do it in a super mod/modern way that feels sharp and well proportioned.

Or you can do it in a more summer/saunter vibe that feels more Sugar Mag than sharp and tailored. I love that too. The look at the top of the post is probably closest to my current state of mind. Slouchy, relaxed, effortless. Take me there oh dress over pants. That girl in the metallic belted dress and pants above? Not an easy look to pull off. But I love how well she's doing it. Fab.

This look is not exactly new, but runways from Chloe to Dries to Chanel have shown this well layered look, and I'm a loyal fan.  The key to getting it right has much to do with proportions, as most fashion does in general. If you are going for the more structured route, I recommend a bell or flared bottom pant, on the longer side.  You can do a skinny as well, but make sure your dress has some volume as in an a Line shape to make it all sing.

If you are going more with the flow and rocking something a bit more gypset, bells can still work but may be fun to try a skinnier pant, either cropped or to the ankle. And this look also works by layering another piece over the dress like a fitted blazer or motorcycle jacket to nip in the silhouette if you're feeling like the shape is a bit too fertile for you.

I just love the idea of wearing this for evening too, the way Emma Watson did with such great flair. It's modern and cool and a nice departure from a cocktail LBD. It's like an extended remix of the LBD, now with pants. Plus you don't have to worry about getting out of your whip and giving everyone a show. Pants are good like that.

And as Summer continues but Fall begins to creep into our style subconscious, think about ways to maximize that cute Summer shift or loose fitting slip dress.  Just pair with some pants and you're doing transitional dressing the right way. Oh, I can't recommend your beau or husband will understand this look. It's not really for him. More for you. As it should be.

And there you have it. Drants 101. I hope you've enjoyed your lesson. Cause that's what's up this mixed message of a Thursday in the 212. Yours, in putting it all together. XO

Good morning, Tuesday. Hazy. Hot. Humid. Repeat. Ah, Summer. I want to love you but struggle with your stickiness. Why must your warmth come with so much oppression?

Oh, well. I should not complain about the heat. Before we know it, it'll be chilly again. 

And of course one starts thinking of Fall wardrobes and such on days such as this, or at least I do. Lately, I've been so into the whole vibe of uniform dressing, and a craving for something pared down and spare. If you were living in New York in the 90s, you'll no doubt remember (or owned) the iconic Prada nylon backpack, which then gave birth to the well worn and known messenger version. I myself did not own one at the time- because I was still rocking my Stussy backpack back then. Yea, I'm that old.

So when I saw this fabulous messenger/military bag on Jolie Laide's website, I was reminded of a time where minimalism was at its peak. I love this bag so much and was happy to read it fits everything you could ever want, including a laptop. It's a great bag for travel and life on the go. PS- one of the founders of Jolie Laide is Andrea Linett, she of magazine editor fame and blogger whom I adore. I like her steez very much and look forward to seeing more fun stuff from this collection of basics to wear day in and day out. And that's why this bag makes it onto my every day wish list- because there's no place this bag would be out of place- even kind of chic with something dressed up, as well as with your gym clothes. I'm glad to see this well known shape making a comeback. I love a good utility bag and this is a nice departure from my typical tote, with a bonus army green lining within to give it that great surplus feel. Time to dig out that vintage Helmut Lang denim jacket, too.

Call this a must have. As in, I must have it. And so must you. At $325 it's not an army/navy store steal, but it also ain't Prada. (See how I just enabled you? I'm good like that).

Cause that's what's up this maven every day recommend of a Tuesday. Yours, in well packed bags.  XO

EDITOR'S NOTE: The bag is satin, people. SATIN. Not nylon. Now it really goes the extra mile when it comes to feeling a bit more dressed up than that old Prada bag sitting in the back of your closet next to your chunky mary janes.  ;0

Good morning, Monday. Hope you had a wonderful 4th. Much to celebrate and I feel more patriotic than I have in some time. I'm glad love won, and can only hope it continues to do so.

So we spent the weekend in BK bbq'ing, cuddling up on the Khan man, and enjoying some down time. But alas, my mind is on the sun, surf, and sand. I need the beach. I need the beach. I need the beach.

So as I was frantically searching for an August rental, I came across these elegant photos of vintage Hamptons life- love the ones from the 60s- just right and so beautiful to look at. 

Hope you enjoy them us much as I did, now back to building estimates and dreaming of beach breezes. Cause that's what's up this midtown not Montauk kind of Monday in the 212. Yours, in ocean filled daydreams. XO

Hey, Wednesday.

I gotta keep this brief because I'm slammed and dreaming of beaches. If I don't see ocean soon, there will be blood.

But for now, enjoy this great pic of the Stones in Montauk, before the Surf Lodge and before Montauk was what it is now. I yearn for the old days as much as I yearn for sea air. If only. I have got to get some beach time and that's that. Montauk is a place that really moves me, despite its obvious hipster shit. I love it there and always will.  Must. Go. To. There. Spending this weekend (not in Montauk) planning said trip. I'm aching for it.

Cause that's what's up this earning my keep kind of Wednesday in the concrete jungle. Yours, in beach envy, and making like Mick and the boys. I've got a mind of my own, and I use it well. But I'd use it better if  I could simply get a few days in the sand. XO

Good morning, Monday. It was a beautiful weekend in New York, and celebration was in the air because love won and ultimately will prevail. Thank goodness for that. 'Bout time.

So I rarely post about men's style but I have to give it up to my newest musical and style obsession, Leon Bridges. LEON BRIDGES. Oh how I love him. And since it's Monday and the beginning of the work week, I'm sure you need something to ease right on into a million conference calls and meetings. Trust me, this is very much what the doctor ordered. 

My husband turned me on to his amazing music- he's a 25 year old Texan with the voice of an angel, if angels sounded like Sam Cooke or Otis Redding. I am a superfan of old soul music and this guy is taking this genre to new and exciting places, while paying great homage to the past. And let's talk about his amazing style.

Russell wears vintage in a way that is so on point. I really like his style. From that heartfelt voice to that great wardrobe, I couldn't be happier to say I just splurged on two tickets to see him at The Apollo in October. That's going to be a great night.

If you're not familiar with his music, check him out on Spotify. His album "Coming Home" was recently released and breaks my heart in the best of ways with every ooh ooh. So good. If you're a fan of soul music, it's a must. I can't wait to see what he does next- in my book, he's already a superstar at 25.

Check out his video for the excellent title track below.

Cause that's what's up this smooth as silk Monday in the 212. Yours, in great men of style and soul, and slow dancing with your honey. XO

Good morning, Friday.

I could post about my new favorite biker jacket or talk about a million other things- but there's really one one thing on my mind:

Love.

I was watching an episode of "Happyish" last night, that depressing show about the ad biz starring Steve Coogan as a tired Gen X ad exec. In one sequence, he was acting like an infomercial host and selling do-it-yourself lobotomy kits. With the way things have been going in our world of late, it's easy to imagine a queue for such an item. But then in the audience, his wife says "yes but if you can't feel anything like pain or sadness, then what about love? Are you willing to not feel anything but never feel love?" She makes an excellent point. Love is worth it.

Because with so much pain, suffering, and sadness that comes with the human experience territory, love is something we should never live without. And with today's ruling that we may love and marry whomever we choose, love has indeed won, after much suffering and pain on the matter of same sex marriage.

As a young girl, I was fortunate enough to grow up with an uncle and a cousin who were proud gay men.  As a product of my upbringing, I had an early sense that being able to love someone was a great gift, regardless of who it was.  Nobody should be denied the right to be with their chosen one. And with so much hate in the world, I think it's a smart decision to choose love for once. Nice one, America. Thank you for doing the right thing. Because today, I feel like love just opened up a super-sized can of whoop ass on hate.

I'm fortunate to be with the person I love more than anyone else, and thank goodness we all can make it legal regardless of our choice.  And with Independence Day around the corner, it's all about liberty, justice, and love for all. For the first time in a while, I'm really feeling so proud of America.  

And to all of my same sex couple friends out there, sending you loads of love today for this huge victory. I can only hope my invitation's in the mail. Cause that's what's up this loving Friday in the 212. Yours, with love, because love has just saved the day. Oh, and happy Pride weekend, New York. I'm sure it's going to be the biggest party yet. XO