Good morning, Wednesday. Looks like the bad weather is out and the sunshine is in. Happy about that.
So lately my schedule has been a bit more free- not that I'm not working but it's a bit more flexible which is very much a gift from the gods. I've had the good fortune to be able to take a few lunches and dinners with some dear female friends. I'm not sure I could survive without female friendship ps- it's just the best thing.
Anyway, something happens to women once we turn 40. I'm not saying it's the same for everyone, and I turned 40 a hot minute ago, so I barely remember it. But I have some friends that are either facing 40 or just past it- and the common thread for most of them is a complete reassessment of life. I've found myself in advertising most of my career so I'm primarily speaking about women who find themselves in the ad world too. And the verdict is in- and advertising is OUT.
Don't attack me, those of you who still love advertising. Many people are still in the game and enjoying great success. I will admit that advertising is full of fun, smart, interesting people. The office culture is cool. You can wear yoga pants to work if you want. There's always someone up for a cocktail or a conversation. But, man. That world wears on your soul. It's stressful. The hours are long. And at some point, particularly when you hit the 4-0ish mark, you look around and feel a bit like Rodney Dangerfield in "Back to School". And if you get that reference, you know exactly what I mean. And if you don't, well- that's part of the issue.
Everyone in advertising is getting younger while the rest of us get older. And some people are cool with that, and some aren't. I'm in the latter camp and not because I hate young people, but I've been questioning what I've wanted from my career for a very long time so working with people who are in their 20s is a constant reminder of my own stagnation. Long before I turned 40 this was going on ps. Although I enjoyed an inspiring, fun as hell career, I'm not sure I was remotely happy. In fact, I know I wasn't. And then I just got tired. Too tired. Primordially tired. And i knew it was time for a change.
PS- I'm still kind of working in advertising. I take projects from time to time with my favorite folks. But I've dedicated myself to full time writing- on behalf of brands mostly but not in ad agencies. And the reason this is so awesome is once I set that intention that writing was my full tilt future, it became my present. And i'm happy.
I used to ask myself a cliched question, to try and figure out what would make me happy when it comes to work. And that question was: Where would I want to go every day when it comes to being happy at work and what does that look like? I never, ever could figure out the answer to that, although I somehow knew it would include my "own" space. I thought for years that meant having my own business with my own office and phones ringing off the hook and lots of deal making and moving and shaking.
WRONG.
What it really meant was I didn't want to go anywhere. I wanted to stay right here at home. And write from home. And tell stories from home. I love working from my living room or bedroom or wherever I want, with my dog by my side and CNN on the TV. It's just where I'm happiest. And it took many lives and many years to get here. But I'm so glad I did. I guess I did the work, and now I can work from home.
My point is we seek and search and reach a point in life where we need things to fall into place. For some that happens at 25. For some it happens at 65. It doesn't matter when it happens but I do think for my friends turning 40, a lot of stuff comes up about where you want to spend your time. Because you start realizing that one minute doing something you don't want to do anymore is just too much. So even if you don't know what you want, don't worry. I know it will come to you like I did for me. And I didn't even have to leave the house to figure it out. Gratitude does not begin to describe it. Work hard. Stay home. Yes please.
Just wanted to share that little story with you, and I know that working from home is not everyone's dream, but I love it. If you are seeking something new, keep looking. And if you're happy and you know it, keep clapping. Cause that's what's up this home is where the heart is kind of Wednesday in the borough of Brooklyn. Yours, in working from the sofa, from under the duvet, or just about anywhere. XO