The Sample Sale Survival Guide a la Maven

Hi, everybody. It's been a bit of a frenzy this week- in NYC for some photo
things and a shoot and I've barely come up for air. I'm feeling off as I
have not done much in the way of exercise or sleeping- this city wears me
out, but I love every minute.

One thing I have a real love/hate with is the NY Sample Sale. I'm going on
record that New York females will cut a woman for a good bargain. It's no
joke. Shopping in this city is a blood sport, and a good sample sale is like
the Olympics. Now that I think about it, the sample sale is more like the
female version of "Fight Club". It's brutal but also a huge, empowering
rush if you make it through. Thus the pic of Tyler Durden to accompany this
post. (Stay with me on this).

I stood in line for the Calypso sale because there was no way in hell I
would ever miss such a thing. You all know I heart Calypso whose flowy,
pretty dresses and such are perfect for Miami days and nights. And I am a
super fan of their perfumes. Mimosa is my go to summer scent.

So the sale begins at 10 am- runs through this Sunday I believe. I was there
at 9:30 on the first day. There was already an army of aviator sunglass
wearing, designer bag carrying, summer frock in full effect dressing women.
And they all looked serious and focused and extraordinarily Type A. They
would be tough to defeat. Particularly murderous was a pregnant woman in
Tory flats whose eyes were bugging out of her Fekkai-tressed head at the
sheer thought of how a forgiving summer dress would complement her ever
growing belly. I started to get some anxiety as the line began to snake around the block. I
would say I was in the first group- about 15 of us diehards. I eyeballed my
competition and knew who I had to take down. The woman in the Alexander Wang
would probably be after some of the same stuff as me, so I had to make sure
I got in before her. This would not be easy.

When the doors opened, there was an immediate frenzy as a cacophony of
sample sale addicts began to feed. I took a deep, cleansing breath and dove
right in, to much success- I bought a zillion things and was quite pleased
with myself for not having a panic attack.

Here's the key and the basic rules of the female Fight Club:

1. Grab as much as you think you can hold- and if you really love something,
grab it in two sizes to make sure it fits.

2. Wear something that slips right over your head for easy trying on.

3. Get the lay of the land quickly- scan the room for stuff that you think
you will love. And then get the hell out.

4. Elbows will be your weapon of choice. They will come in handy when some
Upper East Side type grabs something you had your eye on.

5. Always remember to watch out for the pregnant ones as they are your
greatest foe- they are so starved for cheap fashion to get them through
their newfound girth, they will simply do anything for it. (Unless of course
you are at more of a body con sample sale- then I would assume you would
compete with the anorexics and gym rats).

6. Edit wisely. You probably don't need ten of the same shirt just because
its cheap.

7. Go on a full stomach and some caffeine. You will need your strength.

And don't even attempt a sample sale if you're not up for a little bit of a
fight, or if you have a horrible anxiety situation. It's not for the faint
of heart or the easily wound up, but it is immensely satisfying to buy so
many of your favorite things, all at rock bottom prices. The city may change
but the sample sale phenom never will. Oh, and to end I will state the 8th
rule of the Fight Club of Palahniuk fame: if this is your first time at
Fight Club, you have to fight.

And that's what's up this bargain basement Thursday in the 212. XO