Yo, Friday. Nice to see ya.
I wasn't going to post today because I got some sad news about a businessacquaintance yesterday. I'm not going to go into details, but I have been
feeling super confused and frustrated since I heard about her. Life is
beyond hard- it can be brutal and scary, especially in a city like New York.
I remember thinking many times how I wasn't going to make it, and the only
thing that saved me were my friends. The importance of having people around
you that you can feel vulnerable around can't be underestimated. I think we
tend to internalize things- a lot of us are "fixers" and don't want to
bother other people with our problems- we're more the listeners when our
friends break up with their beaus, when they vent about work, or when their
mother is driving them crazy. But once in a while, we all need a hand. It's very brave to share your
issues with people who care about you- family or friends. To show
vulnerability is not a weakness, it's a soft side of us that is beautifully
human and alive. You simply can't be a person on this Earth without
acknowledging how tough it is to be here sometimes. I have talked about how Facebook and blogging and all of those things allow
us to serve up an edited view of our worlds- we show what we want to show.
It is of course easier to talk about what you ate for dinner than talking
about how stressful your life is. Maybe it's more important to have 1 or 2
great friends in your life than it is to have 1000 Facebook friends. Because
even though you're sharing on a grand scale, when you're hurting it's
private and only meant for a select few who are there to help you carry the
load. I wasn't even going to post today to honor this acquaintance of mine- it
certainly didn't feel right posting about shoes or clothes or quaint
restaurants. But I chose to because I phoned a friend and chatted with her
about this huge loss and after about half an hour puzzling over this
tragedy, we ended up laughing about shows on Bravo and how cab drivers in
New York refuse to turn on the air, even in 95 degree heat. I needed someone
to help me come out of my sadness, and she was there for me. For this I am
grateful. My point of this post? Never ever think you have to solve everything alone.
You are all beautiful and special and should not be afraid to talk to
someone you love about what's on your mind. Don't worry about judgment or
perception- we all want to help the people we adore. Even with all of this
social media and constant "connecting", we can still feel so very alone. So
be a bit analog and pick up the phone or meet for a coffee or a margarita or
a grilled cheese and talk to someone. There simply is no substitute for
that. Much love to you all- that's what's up this pensive Friday in the MIA. XO