Hey peeps happy Wednesday. Halfway there, living on a prayer, blah blah blah.
If you are a regular reader of this blog, you've no doubt noticed I like to keep things generally positive- and talk about the stuff that inspires and pleases me to no end. But if you know me in real life you know I am prone to cynicism and a bit of a bite. I can't help it. In my quest to observe, I find myself hating on people sometimes. More than sometimes. But not all the time...
Because today in midtown I found myself irritated by one of my biggest pet peeves, and that is- why on Earth do chicks have to taste everything?
You no doubt know what I mean- the girl in front of you in the DVF wrap dress feels the need to taste every soup flavor available while the rest of us poor schmucks wait in line. Perhaps because she has been so busy being #blessed and taking selfies, she has somehow forgotten what tomato soup tastes like, therefore she must take a small plastic cup and taste it. And then proceed to taste all of the soup flavors. While hoards of hungry people wait in line and plot her demise. And later on tonight, after Soul Cycle and before she binge watches Bravo, she's no doubt going to go the fro yo spot and taste every damn flavor they have too. #options. The mind boggles.
It's immensely irritating to me when chicks do this, and I say chicks because I don't know many dudes that do this, unless their chick makes them. What weird compulsion prevents you from settling on one flavor of yogurt or a really classic soup? Examine this ladies, because it may be the reason you can't find your soulmate. Stop tasting everything and pick one for Lord's sake. Life's too short. It's "Eat, Pray, Love" remember? Not "Taste, Pray, Love", ya dig?
To me, I like the idea of not trying something before I eat it. If I'm committed to vanilla, I'm committed to vanilla. If it's French vanilla or Tibetan vanilla I care not- I'm gambling on vanilla and if I don't like it, NBD. Perhaps these girls are simply watching their weight and filling up on sips of soup or spoons of yogurt? I don't know but it's irksome to say the very least. I hate it. And want it to stop. Pick a soup and move on. MOVE ON. What's the worst thing that could happen? You're disappointed by Chicken Orzo or Dutch Chocolate? Deal with it. Life is hard.
I feel the same way about wine tasting, although this sentiment may not be shared by the rest of you because you're all posh and stuff.
I recently did a photo shoot for a well known wine brand and we were treated to a lovely tasting of their finest offerings. And when I say tasting, I mean a taste.
After weeks of planning and plotting and crafting, I needed more than a bloody taste. I wanted a whole glass. A whole glass of chardonnay. A whole glass of pinot noir. A whole glass of something, anything. Perhaps two glasses even. But more than a damn taste. Please. I need more. As I looked around at my colleagues, I noticed they were taking their time sipping and swirling, while I basically guzzled and eyed my glass, hoping somehow that magic would prevail and it would be full. No such luck. I hate a taste. Give me the bloody glass.
So much like life, I want more than a taste. And maybe because I'm a girl who knows what I like that I can't be bothered with sampling every flavor in the kitchen. Test drive a car before you buy it? Sure. Try on a gluttonous pair of jeans or shoes before you commit? Yes. Read some reviews before settling on a hotel on Mars? Mos def. But tasting flavors you have eaten your whole life just so you can be a pain in the ass? Nope. Don't.
Just get the soup or the fro yo and keep your shit together. We'll be good. Cause that's what's up this chicken noodle of a Wednesday in the 212. Yours, in making good choices, and not tasting them first. Ladies, we've come too far for this noise. Stop tasting shit. "Can I taste the vegetable soup?" No. You can't. Get a life, and don't taste it first. XO