Good afternoonish Thursday. I'm still hanging out in LA and looking forward to coming back to New York tomorrow. Funny thing happened last night that showed me the harsh reality of why, though I do dig it here loads, I could never live here. A few of us were outside the studio on the sidewalk, chatting about this and that after a long day, and an older couple came off of the beach (we are steps from the ocean) and as they walked past us, the woman said, very very sweetly, "you're taking up the whole sidewalk you know" and continued to smile and sail past us, on her way to a dinner most likely composed of sunshine, quinoa, and passive agressiveness. I mean...if you want me to move, just say move. In New York, if this situation were to happen, the following are possiblities of what would occur:
1. An exasperated "uchh" or hiss would be uttered as said person scurried past
2. That same person might say "nice to take up the whole sidewalk, ass munch" or some such profane statement.
3. The phrase "annoying" (in quiet hushed yet maniacal sing song) would be uttered, accompanied by an eye roll.
What's my point here? People in Los Angeles, going under the guise of perpetual sunshine, fresh avocados, and a love of composting think they are doing the Earth a very big favor by just gracing us with their presence. So saying something shitty in a nice way is an excuse to be a brat- when in reality, I'd rather you just be a brat. Don't sugar coat something shitty. That's my take and I'm sticking with it- the frosty PC thing just doesn't have clout with me.
Anyhoo, onward. I turned yet another year older, ate some great meals here, stared at the ocean, read books over breakfast, and felt unphased by the fact that my John Hughes references are lost on a generation who did not grow up with "The Breakfast Club". PS- I know people who have never seen "Fast Times"- there's just no excuse for that. But birthdays aside, Fridays are all for fivin' out- so here is a list of 5 things about getting older that I have noticed- and there's really no avoiding getting older...believe me, I've tried. Have at it:
Your body changes. Don't let anybody tell you you can have the same body you had when you were 25, because unless you are Nordic, Brazilian, or some sort of anomaly, it's going to happen. Yea, you can fight it tooth and nail and eat frosted air and ice chips and kale and work out at bootcamps named after Barry, but just accept that you are not supposed to look 25 when you are in your 40s. You can try your best, but if you somehow feel it's appropriate to rock a too tight bandage dress into your middle years, G-d bless you but I don't. Nobody wants to see that, so accept that. And work out, eat well, and be cool with the fact that you are not perfect. It's totally cool.
You become grateful. OK, maybe not you, but I do. I spent many years being pissed off at authority or anyone who I perceived as getting in my way. I incessantly complained about work, about life, about why I was not where I wanted to be. But as you get older and are so much more in tune with people that are truly suffering and enduring real heartbreak, you become grateful for what you do have and stop playing the victim- and I feel like I have a lot. Of course the Jewish side of me thinks I'm dying tomorrow of flesh eating bacteria as a result, but that's another story. I'm truly grateful for everything I have, and though the years are passing and my trips to get my hair dyed are more frequent, I care not. I'm a lucky lady for more reasons than I count.
You look at Eileen Fisher, then get scared, then buy nothing.I had to add this because it just happened to me. Two nights ago in Bloomingdales in Santa Monica. As I waited for a friend to go eat dinner, I was browsing the racks of Bloomie's (very civilized ps in Santa Monica and not at all the mess it is in New York) and happened to see a cute striped dress of a nice shape I thought would look good on me. But then I saw it was Eileen Fisher and got very freaked out. I'm just not quite ready for Eileen Fisher, but perhaps next year will be a different story. To me, buying a piece of Eileen Fisher( for those of you who don't know this brand, think upscale art teacher and loose, more mature silhouettes) is indicative of a huge identity crisis on my part, I'm just not ready. I will own the fact that being comfortable is more important than almost anything to me when it comes to clothes- if I am in shoes that hurt, skirts that are too tight, or tops I can't breathe in, it's best not to come near me. I simply can't function that way, and the ease with which I approach living these days is reflected in my wardrobe- none of which is constricting, overly structured, or breath holding. I'll leave that to Daphne Guiness, who is fabulous ps and coincidentally, would rather insert a sword into her (tiny little) stomach than wear Eileen Fisher. This is not a personal attack on EF- it's just a a way of saying that although I may not do much short and tight anymore, I'm not ready to teach a ceramics class.