Good morning, Thursday. It feels good to be writing again every day. I need it and hopefully you do to. Thanks to those I reached out to for feedback on the blog- I appreciate it more than you know. And if anyone ever wants to reach out to me and tell me if there's anything you'd love to see here, don't hesitate to holler. Just not that loud. I have a bit of a headache.
So I'm having a bit of a moment. Again. Sigh.
A dear friend of mine posted an excellent blog piece the other day about personal branding, and being very clear about what your unique brand proposition is and how to share it with the world. This has always eluded me, even though I've spent the majority of my career producing work that's helped big brands do just that. But what of my brand? My elusive very me thing that I have to share with all of you and the rest of the planet?
On one side is my creative brain. As you know, I adore writing. It's joyful for me- not complicated- but certainly more difficult when it comes to writing for other people and on assignment. I've thought about a book just can't even wrap my head around that. I do think writing more would make me very happy. Very happy indeed.
On the other side is my producer lady "get it done" brain. I love the freelance life I've built, but once in a while, during times of tumult (like our impending move to a new place up the street), I start grappling with the feeling of not having skin in the game. What I mean by that is that freelance life absolutely suits me, but once in a while I wonder if there's a job out there that speaks to my skill set. I'm almost certain it's not in an ad agency (although who knows), but could it be working for a brand and making great content so that constant need to hustle for work subsides a bit? It would be nice to take a breath and stake a claim. To settle in somewhere. I don't know. I'm struggling with this lately. Would it be nice to have somewhere to go every day or would it be monotonous? I mean, I can't even have the same hairstyle for more than three months.
Last night I had dinner with an old pal who is quite successful in his own right. He's built a career in a very small business, and now he's on his own consulting and not 100% sure it's right for him, but he's enjoying the freedom of work/life it allows. We talked forever about work and I realized I'm prone to "what else" syndrome. Combined with a wicked case of "what's next". I have never been able to stay put- in my mind or in my work. I always am wondering what else I can be doing or what's coming around the bend. I try so hard to be one with my immediate path but it's tough for me. I love that I'm always willing to flex and adapt and try. I hate that I often feel it's not quite enough.
In my personal life, things are different. I know I love New York, I know I love my neighborhood, and of course, I love my partner in crime and our fur baby beyond belief. In terms of "what else" when it comes to personal stuff, I'd love to stop eating like a garbage can. I'd love to finally get Lasik (although my friend last night informed me you can smell your cornea burning omg), I'd love to start drawing and painting again and incorporating some artwork into the blog and Insta game. But really, I feel good in terms of personal stuff for the most part.
But this sticky work thing. Why is what I'm doing never enough? What causes me to feel so dissatisfied? Is this the provenance of a somewhat privileged life? I don't know the answer. I just feel I've been in middle Earth for so long and I'm not at all sure how to recoup. I guess for now I'll just keep keeping on, but guaranteed I'll always be looking around the corner. Maybe that's just how I am, and maybe that's what my personal brand is all about- always looking for new ways to contribute and thinking about what else I could be doing to move myself forward and keep getting better. A bit of a rant today, folks. But that's where I am this week. First I was afraid of getting dressed for work, then I was afraid of getting dressed up, and then I went to ABC Carpet and felt better about things. That's about right for this week- now let's see what's next for this little maven of a brand- and as the photo above says so clearly, I truly have no idea. Cause that's what's up this what else of a Thursday in the 212. Yours, in staying and going and everything in between. XO