What's it all about, mommy? The evolution of mommy style

Good morning, Monday. I'm not sure why the work gods smiled upon me the past few weeks, but grateful to be working from home right now because it's insanely cold outside. Hope wherever you are, you're staying warm. It hasn't been this bad all winter, yet here we are.

So something on my mind- about a week ago I posted an article  from the NYT (link here) about mom style in Brooklyn, and how it involves a No. 6 clog boot and something called a Salt strap, a fancy, crafty looking strap that you can attach to all of your favorite handbags for a bit of funky flair. I knew nothing of the strap ps although I can swear one of my fav stylish moms in Boston shouted this out a few years ago. Anyway, I'm well aware of the clog boot. Every mom and non mom alike in my neighborhood of Cobble Hill rocks them everywhere. I'm a big fan of a clog but somehow never bought these- I have a cool pair of No. 6 clog pump type things and a few pairs of Rachel Comey clog like objects. I've never been without a clog of some type in my wardrobe come to think of it, and I'm not even a mom. Mom by osmosis because of where I live? Perhaps. I was taken by how many of my friends had opinions and comments on the piece, with an almost overwhelmingly positive response while a few asked if the clogs were truly comfortable. I've always been intrigued by Brooklyn mommy style- the clogs, the oversized silhouettes, the hair in a bun revealing expensive highlights but lack of a hair brush. The perfect, fresh faced skin. Sure there's some that look a bit worse for wear from all night marathons with baby, but in general I've been amazed by how great and stylish the moms are in my neck of the woods.

I got to thinking about mom style and its evolution, as one does. I've always been a geek for fashion history, so I couldn't help but think about how mom dress has changed throughout the years. Obviously we are no longer in an era of leaving it to beaver in terms of style- the nipped in waist, full skirted look has not been in since the 50s. In the 60s I think many moms defaulted to the Jackie O. if they were not doing the hippie thing. My own mother was super chic with her blonde beehive and sleeveless sheath. This photo is from the 60s when my sister was wee and I just love it. You can see where I get it from, right?

Anyway, if I can look at my own mom, the 70s were a bit of a mixed bag- the true emergence of a more casual, laid back approach when it came to mom style- note the mom bun on my very own mom above, as well as some pretty tasty bell bottoms. I don't have a ton of pics from the era, but I recall a lot of silk head scarves, bell bottoms and button downs tied at the waist (that's my dad's mom, my dad, and my mom looking super duper fly). My mother was always a stylish type and I never, ever remember her dressing like a typical mom, whatever that implied. And then of course the 80s came and went. I will say this- I don't recall that many sexy moms in my come uppance, not like we see today. Or "cool" moms for that matter. Moms were just, well moms. 

That's why I'm having a hard time recalling what they dressed like in my true coming of age. All I have as a barometer is my own mother, who wore a ton of CP Shades and panne velvet in the 80s. Oh and a ton of gauze in the summer time. By a company called New Hero. It was cute. And bright. A lot of turquoise and coral if I'm remembering correctly. Here she is above with her popped collar and pearls and my ever present well dressed father, clowning for the cameras as per usual. He was a huge fashion plate too- and I now realize he was kind of hip hop in a weird way. Tons of Polo, Porsche Carrera shades, and shell toe Adidas.  I do recall that my own mom did not wear a ton of jeans once she hit her 40s, and neither do I. Strange that.

Enter the 90s and the ubiquitous mom jeans era. When those suckers became ironically stylish again, I almost threw up. That's a never, ever silhouette for me and that's that. Also- enter Peg Bundy, the mom who gave not a single F and dressed like a floozy and embraced a ton of mom do nots like NOT cooking, NOT dressing appropriately, etc. Her wise cracking, outsized tressed version of motherhood was refreshing, not to mention the mothering style of Roseanne, or lack thereof. Both of these sitcom moms came onto the scene at the tail end of the 80s, and dominated the 90s with their rebellious version of mommyhood.  Oh and coincidentally, this was also the era of "Sex and the City" where the notion of singledom and non motherhood became not only acceptable, but chic. I think that show affected me more than I care to admit. Suddenly, the option of tons of friends, tons of shoes, and no babies was completely ok. True I got married, but I can honestly say I never, ever felt societal pressure to have children. And I never imposed that on myself.

And now that most of my friends are mom, I'm the odd one out. My style is not reliant on picking up kids at school, play dates, or soccer practice. In that same NY Times article, a particular winter coat simply referred to as the "Amazon jacket" was mentioned, and to be honest, I had no idea what it was. As someone who follows fashion with a savant like ferocity, I felt remiss in not knowing about this phenomenon. And then my cool friend showed up wearing it at Balthazar for breakfast the other day. And she's the coolest mom I know. It's interesting how a phenomenon like that jacket can completely pass you by if you're not part of the mom brigade. I wondered if it would be weird if I wore one, though I do have a fur child so surely that could count? 

And then last night on Shark Tank I saw a very pretty young woman come on promoting her company, Sonnet James, a dress company for moms who are not the clog type and more the dress type. I admit I looked at these dresses and judged them as prissy at first, but then her story of a difficult childhood and then single motherhood had me flipping to her site and darn if I didn't see some really cute things there. I was touched by her journey and though I chalked her up initially as yet another Type A mommy from Silicon Valley, how wrong I was. Judging mothers is not nice by the way. And in my guilt, I bought a dress from her site. This leopard one. Because supporting other women is beyond important to me, even though I'm not a mom I figured I could pull off this dress. PS- aware of the obvious homage to Peg Bundy. 

What's striking to me most of all is there are plenty of options for all mommy styles. And though I've often thought about what my generation of "cool parents" will be like for all the kids who have to deal with parents in slouchy ski hats and designer sneakers, I think it will all be ok. Like everything, fashion evolves and flexes and I think it's cool that moms are even talking or thinking about preserving their personal style as their lives become more about the kiddos than spending hours in their closets.  And as I've aged out of dressing with too much this or that hanging out, I think I've embraced a bit of mama style myself. I often wear yoga pants all day, I crave comfort over everything else, and although I spend a good bit on my hair color, my hair style is often bed headed beyond bed headed. I suppose the bottom line is this- there's no big difference between mommy style and grown ass woman style. We all want the same things from our wardrobes. We all have busy, always on lives. And we all want to be stylish, but not spend too much time, money, or effort thinking about it.  And I do think the fact that women have babies so much later nowadays contributes to their desire to keep their personal style, and their sense of selves, intact. Case in point? One of my style icons, Christine Barberich, one of the founders of Refinery 29.  She just had a baby at age 49, and look how incredible she is. That's her above. I give her so much credit for doing it, and no, I'm not getting any ideas other than style tips from her. 

Just thought I'd share some thoughts on mom style, and the fact that although I'm well aware I live in a very chic style bubble known as New York City, I appreciate the rocking moms I see everywhere, looking fab as they juggle a million things all at once. Cause that's what's up this moms rock kind of Monday in the 718, Yours, in mom jeans and everything in between. XO